babyNICA

2010-07-24T22:53:00.003+08:00

"True love begins when nothing is looked for in return." ~ Antoine De Saint-Exupery ~

Simple words, but how many understand? Even if they do understand, how many people actually can I that? Why do people make it so hard to love? Why do people betray their love ones? What do love actually mean to all those people? Looking at friends around me and I know how fortunate I am to have someone that loves me the way I love him. To me he's like a dream come true, all that I've ever wanted. Isn't it great to have someone that cheer you when you are down? I always thought that having someone = to enhance your life and not make your life goes down. I'm kinda upset for my friends around me who's partner can't give them that kinda love, but why after so much that I've told them, they still choose that kinda path? I know that they can find someone better, they deserve to be love just like anyone else, but why do they always love the wrong one?

signing off
baby\ting
24 July 2o1o - 11o1pm

2010-04-04T21:56:00.002+08:00

Extracted from 'Our Daily Bread'
Just Tell The Story

While they were stoning him, Stephen prayed, "Lord Jesus, receive my spirit." Then he fell on his knees and cried out, "Lord, do not hold this sin against them." When he had said this, he fell asleep.
And Saul was there, giving approval to his death.
On that day a great persecution broke out against the church at Jerusalem, and all except the apostles were scattered throughout Judea and Samaria. Godly men buried Stephen and mourned deeply for him. But Saul began to destroy the church. Going from house to house, he dragged off men and women and put them in prison.
Those who had been scattered preached the word wherever they went. Philip went down to a city in Samaria and proclaimed the Christ there. When the crowds heard Philip and saw the miraculous signs he did, they all paid close attention to what he said. With shrieks, evil spirits came out of many, and many paralytics and cripples were healed. So there was great joy in that city. (Act 7:59-8:8)

The main character in the movie Up Close And Personal is a TV newsman who of the world's trouble spots. After his death, he is remembered for saying, "I once thought reporting was about glory. But I'm here for only one reason - to tell the story."
In Acts 8, we read that Jerusalem's Christians were scattered abroad to escape persecution. Everywhere they went, they preached the message of Christ (v.4). Saul, their persecutor, was later converted and became an apostle. Toward the end of his life, Saul, also known as Paul, decided to go to Jerusalem, where he knew he would be persecuted. But he remained undeterred, declaring that his purpose was "to testify to the gospel of the grace of God" (Acts 20:24).
God still calls people to tell the good news of Jesus to those who don't know Him. In his book The Conversion Of The Church, Samuel Shoemaker states, "The demand is human heart-hunger. The supply is the grace of God. We are only distributors." But we don't work alone or with mere human energy. God is working is us (Philippians 2:13).
When witnessing for Christ, may it be with love and humility - motivated by a desire for His glory, not our own. We're just here to tell the story. - Joanie Yoder

I love to tell the story,
For some have never heard
The message of salvation
From God's own holy Word. - Hankey

God has left us in the world to witness to the world.

2010-04-01T05:55:00.003+08:00

To Angela Tan Yan Shan
I know that you are out of reach and we couldn't get you too. I also know that you do check out blog once in a blue moon. I really hope that you see this.

Maine and I worries about you almost everyday. Everytime we meet out/call each other, there was never a time you were not mention. You know how worried we are for you don't you? We really do not want you to live your life like that, though we know it's your choice, but you do know we care, far more than him does.

Frankly speaking, we never wanted you to be with that guy, he can't give you happiness but pain. Even us as a friend, we could not bear to see you tears (at least if you do, we'll cry with you), and it hurt us seeing you like that. I always wanted all my friends to be happy as I believe everyone deserve to be love. Don't throw away your happiness. YOU CAN BE LOVE TOO.

Love is not about taking charge of your partner's life, but to bring joy to them, to understand them. I don't see that happening to you, instead, you are slowly drifting a part from your friends and families, that's too much of a control. You are a sensible girl my dear and you should know what's right and what's wrong. Though people always say, love is blind, but it doesn't mean that you have to really love blindly till the extend that even when he abuse you, you still give in. By acting this way, you are only hurting yourself and those people around you who cares for you.

Honey, I just want you to know, we all cares for you and loves you way more than that guy would ever love. We really hope you would make a right decision for yourself and your little one. He's not the one for you my dear. Just to let you know if you have forgotten. We(Maine and I) will always be here for you, anytime, anywhere, just give us a call. Even if you do not, visit your mom often, don't hurt her anymore.

2010-03-26T05:52:00.002+08:00

I should have a little more faith in my Father, probably not little more but all my faith. He have answered my prayer everytime, making EVERYTHING and yes I'm serious when I said EVERYTHING possible for me. He laid down every single path for me SO SO WELL that I do not have to go through any pain. I'm starting to love this little relationship with my Father. He's so great. People who have experience him might know what I'm talking about. Just yesterday, I went for my body check up as my company requires me to, and I was super worried about having to take the blood test. I was worried that my anemia would affect my job too, but guess what, everything goes well. I don't even have to bear the pain of having the injection poke into my skin. The fear, the pain, whatever you can think of. You don't know how amazing it is till you experience all this yourself. Friends/family member that read my blog, I really do hope that you guys are willing to turn yourself to Christ. It's really a wonderful thing, trust me. You will have unlimited joy and you'll never have to be worried about anything, and it's true when I said ANYTHING. It's all in the hands of our God, the Almighty. He knows us well to know what we are afraid of, what kind of situation we are in. If you seek him, he will sure be there for you. There's so much He have done for me already, though I'm just a new Christian. He never leave me alone to fight my own battle, He's ALWAYS there. This kind of relationship is so so much better than anything else. If you think that your relationship with your parents/spouse is wonderful, this is even better. You know that He will never abandon you, will never let you down nor will He hurt you in any way. It's a great thing to me and I love it a lot. Thank You for everything my Father :)

2010-03-23T19:04:00.002+08:00

Extracted from 'Our Daily Bread'
Think About It
Reading and Meditation
Therefore, my brothers, you whom I love and long for, my joy and crown, that is how you should stand firm in the Lord, dear friends!
I plead with Euodia and I plead with Syntyche to agree with each other in the Lord. Yes, and I ask you, loyal yokefellow, help these women who have contended at my side in the cause of the gospel, along with Clement and the rest of my fellow workers, whose names are in the book of life.
Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me - put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. (Philippians 4:1-9)

According to one little boy, "Thinking is when your mouth stays shut and your head keeps talking to itself."
The way our head talks to itself tells a lot about how we are doing morally and spiritually. To guard our mid and to keep out the influences that will hinder our walk with God is to use our mind in the way He desires.
The Bible gives us clear guidelines - spelling out the kinds of things we should think about. For example, Psalm 1:2 and Psalm 119:97 tell us to meditate on God's Word day and night. That should be our first priority in the thinking department.
But we have a life to live, and we can't spend all of our waking moments meditating on Scripture. Yet even when we are thinking about the mundane aspects of life, we need guidance. Paul told us that we should think about things that are true, noble, just, pure, lovely, of good report, virtuous, and praiseworthy (Philippians 4:8). In our daily activities, those words should govern what is on our mind.
When our head "talks to itself," it needs to say, "Keep the impure and ungodly thoughts out of here!" When we're thinking that way, we'll know what to do, how to behave, where to go, and what to say. - Dave Branon

Let us think about what's good -
What's right and pure and true;
May God's Word control our thoughts
In everything we do. - Fitzhugh

But his delight is in the law of the LORD,
and on his law he meditates day and night. (Psalm 1:2)

Oh, how I love your law!
I meditate on it all day long. (Psalm 119:97)

Right thinking leads to right living.

Extracted from Every Day with Jesus written by Selwyn Hughes
Salvation in a sentence
Reading and Meditation
Therefore, holy brothers, who share in the heavenly calling, fix your thoughts on Jesus, the apostle and high priest whom we confess. He was faithful to the one who appointed him, just as Moses was faithful in all God's house Jesus has been found worthy of greater honor than Moses, just as the builder of a house has greater honor than the house itself. For every house is built by someone, but God is the builder of everything. Moses was faithful as a servant in all God's house, testifying to what would be said in the future. But Christ is faithful as a son over God's house. And we are his house if we hold on to our courage and the hope of which we boast.
So, as the Holy Spirit says:
"Today, if you hear his voice,
do not harden our hearts
as you did in the rebellion,
during the time of testing in the desert,
where your fathers tested and tried me and for forty years saw what I did.
That is why I was angry with that generation,
and I said, 'Their hearts are always going astray,
and they have not known my ways'
So I declared on oath in my anger,
'They shall never enter my rest.' "
See to it, brothers that none of you has a sinful, unbelieving heart that turns away from the living God. But encourage one another daily, as long as it called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin's deceitfulness. We have come to share in Christ if we hold firmly till the end the confidence we had at first. As has just been said:
"Today , if you hear his voice,
do not harden your hearts
as you did in the rebellion." (Hebrews 3:1-15)

'We will never be able to understand the gospel,' said a lecturer at the college where I trained for the ministry, 'until we can condense it into a single sentence.' When I first heard him make that statement I thought to myself, 'If the gospel can be condensed into a single sentence, then why do I need to spend these years training for the ministry?' Later I came to see what he meant: putting something into a single sentence is a way of showing how clearly we comprehend its essential features.
Whenever I am asked what are the essential features of salvation my mind immediately goes to the words of Jesus on the cross: 'Today you will be with me in paradise' (Luke 23:43). Take His first word: 'Today.' That suggests salvation is immediate and present. Notice there was no delay between the request from the thief - 'Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom' (Luke 23:42) - and the Master's reply. Christ did not say to him, 'I'm sorry, but you do not have enough time to prepare yourself for paradise. If you had come to Me earlier, when I could have instructed you and made you one of My disciples, I might have been able to help. Now, however, it's too late.'
Oh, the wonder of eternal salvation! It never asks us to make ourselves better before we come to God, never puts us on a period of moral probation, never postpones acceptance until some long or painful process of purification has been accomplished. The old hymn puts it beautifully when it says:
The vilest offender who truly believes
That moment from Jesus a pardon receives.
That moment!

O God, how can I sufficiently thank You for the immediacy of Your gospel? Other faiths would first send me away to work on improving my character; You receive me just as I am. And in that I rejoice. In Christ's name. Amen.

2010-03-22T18:24:00.003+08:00

Extracted from 'Our Daily Bread'
Our Children Are Watching
Reading and Meditation
These are the commands, decrees and laws the Lord your God directed me to teach you to observe in the land that you are crossing the Jordan to possess, so that you your children and their children after them may fear the LORD your God as long as you live be keeping all his decrees and commands that I give you, and so that you may enjoy long life. Hear, O Israel, and be careful to obey so that it may go well with you flowing with milk and honey, just as the LORD, the God of your fathers, promised you.
Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. Love the LORD our God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.
When the LORD your God brings you into the land he wore to your fathers, to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, to give you - a land with large, flourishing cities you did not build, houses filled with all kinds of good things you did not provide, wells you did not dig, and vineyards and olive groves you did not plant - then when you eat and are satisfied, be careful that you do not forget the LORD, who brought you our of Egypt, our of the land of slavery.
Fear the LORD your God, serve him only and take your oaths in his name. Do not follow other gods, the gods of the peoples around you; for the LORD your God, who is among you, is a jealous God and his anger will burn against you, and he will destroy you from the face of the land. Do not test the LORD your God as you did at Massah. Be sure to keep the commands of the LORD your God and stipulations and decrees he has given you. Do what is right and good in the LORD's sight, so that it may go well with you and you may go in and take over the good land that LORD promised on oath to your forefathers, thrusting out all your enemies before you, as the LORD said. (Deuteronomy 6:1-19)

It can be disturbing to realize that our children often mirror the way we speak and act. I remember being concerned about the way my son angrily lashed out at his sister when she was annoying him. My wife gently pointed out to me that his behavior was a reflection of mine.
A few weeks later, I caught myself lashing out at my son when I was frustrated. Through my wife's encouragement, I apologized to him for my behavior and told him I would learn to treat him with more respect. In the months that followed, I noticed that my son's attitude toward his sister also improved.
Children do not learn to love and obey God only by what we say. They also learn by watching what we do. We are to teach also learn by watching what we do. We are to teach them constantly about God and His Word as we "sit in [our] house, when [we] walk by the way. when [we] lie down, and when [we] rise up" (Deuteronomy 6:7). Along with what we say to our children, we need to set an example by our love and obedience to the Lord.
We can't be perfect parents, but our children must see our desire to please the Lord. And when we fall short, they need to see our repentance. We teach them by both what we say and what we do. - Albert Lee

You're teaching a lesson each day that you live;
Your actions are blazing a trail
That children will follow for good or for ill;
You can help them or cause them to fail. - Bosch

A godly parent is a child's best guide to God

Extracted from Every Day with Jesus by Selwyn Hughes
Today!
Reading and Meditation
Two other men, both criminals, were also led out with him to be execute. When they came to the place called the Skull, there they crucified him, along with the criminals - one on his right, the other on his left. Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." And they divided up his clothes by casting lots.
The people stood watching, and the rulers even sneered at him. They said, "He saved others; let him save himself if he is the Christ of God, the Chosen One."
The soldiers also came up and mocked him. They offered him wine vinegar and said, "If you are the king of Jews, save yourself."
There was a written notice above him, which read: THIS IS THE KING OF THE JEWS.
One of the criminals who hung there hurled insults at him: "Aren't you the Christ? Save yourself and us!"
But the other criminal rebuked him. "Don't you fear God," he said, "since you are under the same sentence? We are punished justly, for we are getting what our deeds deserve. But this man has done nothing wrong."
Then he said, "Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom."
Jesus answered him, "I tell you the truth, today you will be with me in paradise." (Luke 23:32-43)

Now we move to our Lord's second cry from the cross: 'Today you will be with me in paradise' (v.43). How amazing is the thought that one of Christ's last acts before He died was to snatch a soul from eternal death and promise him a future with Him in heaven.
Picture the scene. At Calvary - the Place of the Skull - Jesus is hanging in agony on the cross with a thief on either side of Him. Since executions were popular with the masses, crowds of people are watching the. Among them, we can assume, and those who just a short time before cried, 'Crucify him!' (v.21). The noise of jeers fills the air. The soldiers, the chief priests and teachers of the law and the mob are hurling insults at Jesus. One of the thieves joins in. 'Aren't you the Christ?' he sneers. 'Save yourself and us! (v.39). The other thief stops this flow of abuse by saying, 'Don't you even fear God when you are dying? We deserve to die for our evil deeds, but this man hasn't done one thing wrong' (vv.40-41, TLB). Then he pleads, 'Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom' (v.42).
This thief shows us just what is needed in order to be saved: the realisation of who Jesus is and an awareness that we have done wrong. That the dying thief should have recognised Jesus as God's Messiah in that situation of shame and humiliation is astonishing. Yet he did. Significantly, he declared his belief that he was guilty and deserved punishment and that Jesus was suffering as One who completely innocent. And this amazing faith in Jesus was awarded.
Over the next few days we shall think a little more about what the promise Jesus made to the thief teaches us about salvation, and rejoice in the wonder of it.

Lord Jesus, thank You that You give salvation to everyone who acknowledges their guilt and has faith in You, no matter what they have done in the past. Give me, I pray, the opportunity to share this good news with someone today. Amen.

2010-03-21T16:55:00.002+08:00

Extracted from 'Our Daily Bread'
Servants Of All
Reading and Meditation
Then the mother of Zebedee's sons came to Jesus with her sons and, kneeling down, asked a favor of him.
"What is it you want?" he asked.
She said, "Grant that one of these two sons of mine may sit at your right and the other at your left in your kingdom."
"You don't know what you are asking," Jesus said to them. "Can you drink the cup I am going to drink?"
"We can," they answered.
Jesus said to them, "You will indeed drink from my cup, but to sit at my right or left in not for me to grant. These places belong to those for whom they have been prepared by my Father."
When the ten heard about this, they were indignant with the two brothers. Jesus called them together and said, "You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave - just as the Son of Man did not come to served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many." (Matthew 20:20-28)

Robert K. Greenleaf, founder of the Greenleaf Center for Servant-Leadership in Indianapolis, said, "The great leader is seen as a servant first, and that simple fact is the key to his greatness."
Two thousand years ago, Jesus taught that truth to His disciples and lived it out. As the Son of God, He had been given "all authority . . . in heaven and on earth" (Matthew 28:18). Yet He did not force people to follow and obey Him. His leadership model was radically different from what we see in today's world. It was one of humility and unselfish service to others.
Christlike leadership means considering the needs of our neighbors before our own, seeking their good, encouraging their spiritual growth and intimacy with God. It means treating others the way God has treated us. Servant leaders employ gentle persuasion and reason rather than barking orders and ultimatums. They don't dictate or demand but recognize that before God they themselves are but servants who are only doing their duty (Luke 17:10)
Whatever our position of leadership, we will never lose if we lose ourselves for others. Service that cares for others is the basis of true greatness. - David Roper

Controlling other people's lives
Is not a leader's trait;
It's serving other people's needs
That God considers great. - Sper

Only the one who has learned to serve is qualified to lead.

Extracted from Every Day with Jesus written by Selwyn Hughes
No absolution
Reading and Meditation

Paul then stood up in the meeting of the Areopagus and said: "Men of Athens! I see that in every way you are very religious. For as I walked around and looked carefully at your objects of worship, I even found an altar with this inscription: TO AN UNKNOWN GOD. Now what you worship as something unknown I am going to proclaim to you.
The God who made the world and everything in it is the Lord of heaven and earth and does not live in temples built by hands. And he is not served by human hands, as if he needed anything, because he himself gives all men life and breath and everything else. From one man he made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live. God did this so that men would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him , though he is not far from each one of us. 'For in him we live and move and have our being.' As some of your own poets have said, 'We are his offspring.'
"Therefore since we are God's offspring, we should not think that the divine being is like gold or silver or stone - an image made by man's design and skill. In the past God overlooked such ignorance, but now he commands all people everywhere to repent. For he has set a day when he will judge the world with justice by the man he has appointed. He has given proof of this to all men by raising him from the dead."
When they heard about the resurrection of the dead, some of them sneered, but others said, "We want to hear you again on this subject." At that, Paul left the Council. A few men became followers of Paul and believed. Among them was Dionysius, a member of the Areopagus, also a woman named Damaris, and a number of others. (Acts 17:22-34)

We continue focusing on one of the great theological questions: Did Christ's prayer of forgiveness which He spoke from the cross mean that His crucifiers were given full and complete absolution? Personally, I cannot believe this for, as I said yesterday, such an action would contradict the rest of Scripture's teaching. Also, a cheap or easy forgiveness would subvert the entire scheme of eternal justice.
This issue becomes even more complicated when we consider the words, '... for they do not know what they are doing' (Luke 23:34). Surely the teaching of Scripture is that no one can excuse their sin on the grounds of ignorance? Paul teaches us in Romans that evil is our choice - we sin because we want to sin.
What, then. is the answer to this problem? I believe it to be this: the crucifixion of Christ was the darkest deed ever committed by human beings and as such deserved the highest penalty and judgment. The sin was of such magnitude that we could hardly blame God if He had said, 'I will never forgive it.' But horrifying though it was to crucify God's eternal Son, our Lord prayed that God would not allow the magnitude of the crime to prevent Him from offering forgiveness to those who crucified Him on the same basis that He offered it to everyone else. What He was praying for, so I believe, was not absolution, but that God would extend His mercy to include even those who were implicated in His death - should they repent. It is my belief that Jesus was saying, 'Father, My crucifixion is the vilest sin humankind has ever committed, but don't let even this prevent You from giving Your forgiveness to those who ask.'

My Father and my God, when I think of how Your Son could plead the case of those who caused His death, I am utterly overwhelmed. I ask myself: could I love like that? In my strength - no; in Your strength - yes. Help me to love as Jesus loved. Amen.

2010-03-19T22:33:00.003+08:00

Extracted from 'Our Daily Bread'
True Satisfaction
Reading and Meditation
I thought in my heart, "Come now, I will test you with pleasure to find out what is good." But that also proved to be meaningless. "Laughter," I said, "is foolish. And what does pleasure accomplish?" I tried cheering myself with wine, and embracing folly -my mind still guiding me with wisdom. I wanted to see what was worthwhile for men to do under heaven during the few days of their lives.
I undertook great projects: I built houses for myself and planted vineyards. I made gardens and parks and planted all kinds of fruit tree in them. I made reservoirs to water groves of flourishing trees. I bought male and female slaves and had other slaves who were born in my house. I also owned more herds and flocks than anyone is Jerusalem before me. I amassed silver and gold for myself, and the treasure of kings and provinces. I acquired men and women singers, and a harem as well - the delights of the heart of man. I became greater by far than anyone in Jerusalem before me. In all this my wisdom stayed with me.
I denied myself nothing my eyes desired;
I refused my heart no pleasure.
My heart took delight in all my work,
and this was the reward for all my labor.
Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done
and what I had toiled to achieve,
everything was meaningless, a chasing after wind;
nothing was gained under the sun. (Ecclesiastes 2:1-11)

The eye is not satisfied with seeing, nor the ear filled with hearing - Ecclesiastes 1:8)

A man stopped at a travel agency and said he wanted to go on a cruise. "Where to?" he was asked. "I don't know," was his reply. So the travel agent suggested that he take a look at a large globe that was in the room. He studied it for some time, then with a look of frustration he exclaimed. "Is this all you have to offer?"
The world in which we live has many things that appeal to us. Apart from what is sinful, we can and should enjoy its pleasures. A delicious meal graced with the good fellowship of friends warms our hearts. The beauties of nature inspire and fill us with wonder. Good music refreshes our souls. And work itself can be fulfilling.
Even in a sin-cursed world we can find great enjoyment. And yet these pursuits do not bring full and lasting satisfaction. In fact, people who live only for self-gratification, no matter how lofty their achievements, will always long for more. It makes no difference how deeply they drink from the wells of this world's pleasures. their thirst is still not satisfied. They must agree with Solomon that "all is vanity and grasping for wind" (Ecclesiastes 2:17).
Only by living for Jesus Christ do we experience true satisfaction. - Richard De Haan

The world is filled with so much good
That brings us joy and pleasures,
But true fulfillment only comes
When Christ we love and treasure. - Sper

Putting Christ first brings satisfaction that lasts.

Extract from Every Day with Jesus written by Selwyn Hughes
Cheap forgiveness?
Reading and Meditation

Jesus said to his disciples: "Things that cause people to sin are bound to come, but woe to that person through whom they come. It would be better for him to be thrown into the sea with a millstone tied around his neck than for him to cause one of these little ones to sin. So watch yourselves.
"If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him. If he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times comes back to you and says, 'I repent,' forgive him."
The apostles said to the Lord, "Increase our faith!"
He replied, "If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mulberry tree, 'Be uprooted and planted in the sea,' and it will obey you.
"Suppose one of you had a servant plowing or looking after the sheep. Would he say to the servant when he comes in from the field, 'Come along now and sit down to eat'? Would he not rather say, 'Prepare my supper, get yourself ready and wait on me while I eat and drink; after that you ma eat and drink'? Would he thank the servant because he did what he was told to do? So you also, when you have done everything you were told to do, should say, ' We are unworthy servants; we have only done our duty.' " (Luke 17:1-10)

Today we ask ourselves: What does our Lord's first cry from the cross - 'Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing' (Luke 23:34) - really mean? Some take a casual approach to the words and say Jesus was well know for His forgiving spirit and for His teaching on the subject of forgiveness, so on the cross He put His teaching into effect. The German poet Heinrich Heine famously said, 'Of course God will forgive me. That's His business.' Does our Lord's prayer for forgiveness mean that those who crucified Him were forgiven even if they did not repent?
If that is the meaning behind these words then they present us with a huge problem, for they would contradict every other teaching of the Scriptures. Take for example, the last words Christ spoke before His cry from the cross. They were addressed to the women of Jerusalem who were openly weeping for Him as He made His way towards Golgotha: 'Do not weep for me; weep for yourselves and for your children' (Luke23:28). Christ then went on to prophesy that a great punishment would fall upon the citizens of Jerusalem because of the injustice being one to Him, and predicted that the day would come when the women would say,' Blessed are the barren women, the wombs that never bore and the breasts that never nursed!" (Luke23:29)
Did He then change His mind and reverse that prophecy in His first cry from the cross? Was our Lord offering cheap forgiveness - forgiveness without repentance? If He was, then He was contradicting the whole tenor of Scripture. And God always speaks, not with two voices, but one.

Lord Jesus Christ, even though it is not yet apparent why You said what You did, help me to learn the valuable lesson that I should always interpret the unclear in the light of the clear. May I never forget that. For Your own dear name's sake. Amen.

2010-03-18T06:39:00.003+08:00

Extracted from 'Our Daily Bread'
A Passion For The Word
Reading and Meditation
Oh, how I love your law! I meditate on it all day long. Your commands make me wiser than my enemies, for they are ever with me. I have more insight than all my teachers, for I meditate on your statues. I have more understanding than the elders, for I obey your precepts. I have kept my feet from every evil path so that I might obey your word. I have not departed from your laws, for you yourself taught me. How sweet are your words to my taste, sweeter than honey to my mouth! I gain understanding from your precepts; therefore I hate every wrong path. (Psalm 119:97-104)

The Bible - how much of it do you know and understand? Does it seem overwhelming? Do you feel it's too late in life to study it seriously? Consider Cyrus' story. Although his parents were Christians, he didn't have much use for the Bible. He was more interested in Shakespeare and history. By the time he was 12, he had charted the entire course of human civilization. But the Bible? He was not interested.
Cyrus grew up to be a respected lawyer. When he was 36, a friend came to his office and confronted him about why he was not a Christian. This conversation led him to faith in Jesus Christ.
Realizing that he knew almost nothing about the Bible, Cyrus determined to know God's Word better than anything else. Soon it became to him "sweeter than honey" (Psalm 119:103). Thirty years later, in 1909, The Scofield Reference Bible was published. The great work of Cyrus Ingerson Scofield was complete.
Do we all have to give up everything else in life to study Bible fulltime? Of course not. But we must recognize that a consistent study of God's Word is a vital part of our growth as Christians. It's the way we learn what God expects of us, and the way to know God Himself. - Dave Branon

Gaining knowledge of God's Word
Can be a worthy goal
If it leads us to the Lord
And nourishes our soul - Sper

One of the marks of a well-fed soul is a well-read Bible.

Extracted from Every Day with Jesus written by Selwyn Hughes.
What can we do with a cross?
Reading and Meditation
Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body. "In your anger do not sin": Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold. He who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with his own hands, that he may have something to share with those in need.
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefits those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of Go with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. (Ephesians 4:25-32)

The thought occupying us at the moment is that Jesus said, 'If anyone would come after me, he must ... take up his cross daily and follow me' (Luke 9:23). Though our cross is a much lesser cross than that which Jesus experienced, it can still be painful. In a church I once pastored, there was a woman who had lost her husband in early life. From the moment of her husband's death she lived in bitterness. Though she came to church regularly, she admitted to me,' I can never forgive God for taking my husband from me.' Her life was not an easy one, but I sometimes trembled for her when I saw the extent to which bitterness had soured her life. She twisted the cross she was on, doubling its pain and, what is more, missing its ministry.
In the same church there was another woman who had also lost her husband while she was still young. Her sorrow was just as great as the other woman's but instead of going about with bitterness, she moved into the community with joy. At times there were tears and deep sadness, but she would wipe away the tears and get on with the task of involving herself in the lives of others who, she said, 'are less blessed than I am.'
Two women with the same cross: one made it a cross of rebellion, the other a cross of redemption. Sooner or later we all reach some kind of Calvary. Perhaps you are there right now. The experience may have come because of some cruelty or neglect by others or because of your own choices of ignorance. The question you have to face now is: What shall I make of my Cavalry? What can I do with my cross? Don't, I beg you, turn it into a cross of rebellion, twisting the cross and doubling the pain. Do what Jesus did with His cross - turn in into redemption.

O God my Father, I long to be rid of all that corrodes my soul. I know that any attitude of bitterness eats like acid into my moral nature. Take from my heart all resentment, and help me to love as You love. In Jesus' name. Amen.

2010-03-17T19:38:00.000+08:00

Extracting from 'Our Daily Bread'
Good News or Bad?
Reading and Meditation
Be dressed ready for service and keep your lamps burning, like men waiting for their master to return from a wedding banquet, so that when he comes and knocks they can immediately open the door for him. It will be good for those servants whose master finds them watching when he comes. I tell you the truth, he will dress himself to serve, will have them recline at the table and will come and wait on them. It will be good for those servants whose master finds them ready, even if he comes in the second or third watch of the night. But understand this: If the owner of the house had known at what hour the thief was coming, he would not have let his house be broken into. You also must be ready, because the Son of Man will come to an hour when you do not expect him." (Luke 12:35-40)

A teacher tells her young students, "Class, I'm going down the hall to the school office for a few minutes. I don't expect to be away long. I'm sure there won't be trouble. I'm trusting you to work on your assignments while I'm gone."
Fifteen minutes pass, then 20, then 40. Suddenly the teacher returns. Dennis has just thrown an eraser at Carol, who is doing her math. Steven is standing on the teacher's desk making faces. The students carrying out the teacher's instructions are delighted at the teacher's return, but Dennis and Steven wish she hadn't come back at all.
Jesus is coming back! That stands as both a warning and a promise throughout the New Testament, as in today's reading from Luke 12. It's good news or bad, depending on who hears it.
In church we sing songs like "Come, Thou Long-Expected Jesus." When we partake of the Lord's Supper, we "proclaim the Lord's death till He comes" (1 Corinthians 11:26). On Sunday morning, the second coming of Christ sounds like great news. But during the rest of the week, are we as ready for His return?
Jesus is coming back! It may be soon. It will be sudden. Is that good news or bad? It's up to you - Haddon Robinson

When Jesus comes to reward His servants,
Whether it be noon or night,
Faithful to Him will He find us watching,
With our lamps all trimmed and bright? - Crosby

For whenever you eat this bread and drink this cup, you proclaim the Lord's death until he comes. (1 Corinthians 11:26)

Watch therefore, for you do not know what hour your Lord is coming. - Matthew 24:42

Extract from Every Day with Jesus written by Selwyn Hughes
Resignation or abandonment?
Reading and Meditation
Christ's sacrifice once for all
The law is only a shadow of the good things that are coming - not the realities themselves. For this reason it can never, by the same sacrifices repeated endlessly year after year, make perfect those who draw near to worship. If it could, would they not have stopped being offered? For the worshipers would have been cleansed once for all, all would no longer have felt guilty for their sins. But those sacrifices are an annual reminder of sins, because it is impossible for the blood of bulls and goats to take away sins.
Therefore, when Christ came into the world he said:
"Sacrifice and offering you did not desire, but you prepared for me; with burnt offerings and sin offerings you were not pleased.
Then I said, 'Here I am- it is written about me in the scroll- I have come to do your will, O God.' "
First he said, "Sacrifices and offerings burnt offerings and sin offerings you did not desire, nor were you pleased with them" (although the law required them to be made). Then he said, "Here I am, I have come to do your will." He sets aside the first to establish the second. And by the will we have been made holy through the sacrifice of the body of Jesus Christ once for all.

Today we continue meditating on the fact that when our Lord was crucified, His first words were not a protest but a prayer: 'Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing' (Luke 23:34). I find it interesting, indeed astonishing, that in the midst of such unutterable agony His thoughts should not focus on Himself but on His Father and on the spiritual needs of those who were crucifying Him. He was not self-centred but other-centred.
Depending on where we live in the world, we may or may not be called upon to die for our faith. But even if we do not suffer physical persecution and martyrdom, Jesus has made it plain that 'If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me' (Luke 9:23). Perhaps for you this cross is taking the form of rejection, misunderstanding, or even mental oppression. It is a far lesser cross than Jesus experienced, but it is painful, all the same. How are you responding? With self-pity or with love? It's not easy to love. I find it difficult at times to go on loving in the face of hurt and pain but, as I am sure you do, I long to be able to make every cross a cross of redemption and not of rebellion.
How can we do this? We must do what Jesus did and accept the fact that we should not just resign ourselves to the will of God, but welcome it. You see, resignation not a Christian grace, for beneath resignation rebellion festers, The mature Christian is not merely resigned to the will of God, acquiescent to it, or conformed to it, but is abandoned to it. Not only what God does, but what God allows wins our willing acceptance.

O God, help me never to forget that no matter what happens, You are my Father. And, as my Father, You are working all things to my good. Help me not just to resign myself to that fact but abandon myself to it. In Jesus' name. Amen.

2010-03-16T18:40:00.003+08:00

Extracted from 'Our Daily Bread'
Prayer Malfunction
Reading and Meditation
Dear Friends, if our heart do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive from him anything we ask, because we obey his commands and do what pleases him. And this is His command: to believe in the name of his Son, Jesus Christ, and to love one another as he commanded us. Those who obey his commands live in him, and he in them. And this is how we know that he lives in us: We know it by the Spirit he gave us. (1 John 3:21-24)

In a box of my father's old tools I found a hand drill that was at least 60 years old. I could barely get the wheel to turn. The gears were clogged with dirt, and the pieces that hold the drill bit in place were missing. But I wanted to see if I could get it to work.
I began by wiping the accumulated dirt and sawdust off the gears. Then I oiled them. At first they turned hard and slow, but I kept working them. Soon the gears were turning smoothly. Then I saw a cap at the top of the handle. Unscrewing it, I discovered the missing parts that would hold the bit in place. I placed them in the drill, inserted a bit, and easily bored a neat hole in a piece of wood.
Working with that old drill taught me something about prayer. Jesus said we will receive from God what we ask of Him (Matthew 7:7-8). But there are conditions. For example, John said we must obey God and do what pleases Him (1 John3:22). This includes believing in His Son and loving one another (v23). If we don't meet God's conditions, our prayers will be ineffective - just like that old drill.
If your prayer-life is malfunctioning, make sure you're meeting the conditions. When you do, you can be confident that your prayers will be effective. - Dave Egner

Forgive us, Lord, our selfish asking,
All that's petty in Your sight;
Oh, help us pray with godly motives
And to seek what's good and right! - D. De Haan

"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened" (Matthew 7:7-8)

Faith and love are vital to effective prayer.

Extracted from Every Day with Jesus
Not a protest - a prayer
Reading and Meditation
The Crucifixion
As they led him away, they seized Simon from Cyrene, who was on his way in from the country, and out the cross on him and made him carry it behind Jesus. A large number of people followed him, including women who mourned and wailed for him. Jesus turned and said to them, "Daughters of Jerusalem, do not weep for me; weep for yourselves and your children. For the time will come when you will say, 'Blessed are the barren women, the wombs that never bore and the breasts that never nursed!' Then
"they will say to the mountains, "Fall on us!"
and to the hills, "Cover us!" '
For if men do these things when the tree is green, what will happen when it is dry?"
Two other men, both criminals, were also led out with him to be executed. When they came to the place called the Skull, there they crucified him, along with the criminals - one on his right, the other on his left. Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." And they divided up his clothes by casting lots. (Luke 23:26-34)

Now we start to focus on the first of Jesus' seven cries from the cross: 'Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing' (v.34). This cry, we should remember, fell from His lips as He was being crucified, possibly while the Roman soldiers were nailing Him to the cross.
Crucifixion was one of the most horrifying forms of torture ever devised by the human mind. Though Roman slaves were crucified, no Roman citizen ever was because it was such a shameful punishment. The Latin word for cross is crux and, as some of you reading this may be aware, it is from this word that the word 'excruciating' is derived. Nothing I say can describe the intolerable pain that went though our Lord's body as the Roman soldiers hammered Him to the cross. Josephus, the Jewish historian, said, 'It was customary for those being crucified, when the nails were being driven into their hands and feet, to curse their crucifiers and to rail down every evil thought upon them.'
But how did our Lord react as He was being crucified? Not with protest - but with a prayer: 'Father, forgive...' How astonishing that in the midst of such distressing circumstances our Lord's first thought should be directed towards His Father. Most people caught up in a moment like this would want to disown God or vent their anger on Him and shout, 'Why are You allowing this to happen to me?' But not Christ. His confidence in God remained intact. Men could hammer the life out of Him, but they could not hammer the love out of Him. He loved and believed in His Father still - even though hell was breaking loose about Him.

O Father, help me to trust Your love so deeply that no matter what situation I find myself in I shall respond to it in the way Jesus did - not with a protest but with a prayer. In His dear name I pray. Amen.

2010-03-15T17:49:00.005+08:00

Extracted from 'Our Daily Bread'
Hard Sayings
Read and meditate
Love for Enemies

But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also. If someone takes your cloak, do not stop him from taking your tunic. Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. Do to others as you would have them do to you.
If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' love those who love them. And if you do good to those who are good to you. what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' do that. And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' lend to 'sinners,' expecting to be repaid in full. But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. (Luke 6:27-35)

Russian novelist Leo Tolstoy tells a story of an old cobbler named Martin. After the death of his wife and child, he cried out in despair to a godly old friend, "What now is a man to live for?" His friend replied, "For God, Marin. For God." And how much one live for God?" Martin asked. "Christ has shown us the way," said the believer. "Buy the Gospels and read. There you'll find our how to live for God. There everything is explained," he said.
So that same day Martin bought a New Testament and began to read. The more he read, the more clearly he understood what God wanted of him and what it meant to live for God. And his heart grew lighter and lighter.
Then one day Marine read Luke 6:27-35, and it suddenly hit him that Jesus' words were hard sayings. He pondered the command in verse 29, "If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also." As he began to see how his life didn't measure up to Jesus' words, he cried out, "O Lord, help me!"
We also may feel that obedience to Jesus' words is too difficult for us. His hard sayings seem impossible to obey. Like Marin, we must cry out, "O Lord, help me!" Without Him we can do nothing. - David Roper

Obeying Christ can seem too hard,
But we must come to see
That all He asks is for our good
To make life full and free. - D. De Haan

The cost of obedience is nothing compared with the cost of disobedience.

Extracted from Every Day with Jesus written by Selwyn Hughes
We hear not just what is said
Read and Meditate
Do good to your servant, and I will live; I will obey your word.
Open my eyes that I may see wonderful things in your law.
I am stranger on earth; do not hide your commands from me.
My soul is consumed with longing for your laws at all times.
You rebuke the arrogant, who are cursed and who stray from your commands.
Remove from me scorn and contempt, for I keep your statues.
Though rulers sit together and slander me, your servant will meditate on your decrees.
Your statutes are my delight; they are my counselors. (Psalm 119:17-24)

We continue with the point we made yesterday, namely that although the cross and the power that flows from it never change, we do. Dr Bruce Theileman makes this point: 'We hear things not just the way they are said, but the way we are.' What he means is this: we evaluate the things we hear in ways that are very personal to us. Two people sit side by side in church listening to a message and, although they both hear what is being said and understand it, because of who they are and where they are in their lives, they will interpret the sermon quite differently.
One of the things that has amazed me over the many years I have been writing Every Day with Jesus is that when as sometimes happens, I receive letters expressing appreciation of something I have said on a particular day, the letters reveal that the readers have interpreted the point differently. In the early days I would think to myself, 'But I didn't say that!' and it took me a long time to realise what was happening: 'We hear things not just the way they are said, but the way we are.'
Is it any wonder that the Bible holds such fascination for the millions of Christ's followers who read and study it day after day? We may see a text differently today from the way we saw it yesterday, not because the truth has changed, but because we have changed. The text does not change its meaning from one day to another - truth never changes. However, we are likely to discover a different application. It is the same with the cross. Its meaning never changes, but throughout this Easter season it may well be that you will hear its message differently.

Yes, Father - grant that this may happen. Let the old, old story come home to me with a freshness such as I have never known before. Take me day by day from clarity to clarity, and from one new unfolding to another. In Jesus' name. Amen.

2010-03-14T16:58:00.001+08:00

My follower must be thinking why I always take so long to update my blog. I think they probably gave up bugging me to update. xD
Oh well there are a few reasons to why I always take so long to update.
- lazy
- too busy with my own stuff to even bother logging on to update my daily activities.
- assuming that she doesn't have much follower so doesn't bother. *cough*

Well I think rather then me cracking my brain thinking of what should I blog each day, I come up with the idea of posting what I've read each day here. It's some how a kind of sharing. xD Though it's kinda religious, I hope you guys still carry on reading. I think there's no harm reading it xD This post would be a long one as I'm gonna post what I've already read.

Day 1
Extracted from the book 'Our Daily Bread'
A Life-And-Death Matter
For reading and meditation
Therefore, brothers, we have an obligation - but it is not the sinful nature, to living according to it. For if you live according to the sinful nature, you will die; but if by the Spirit you have to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live, because those who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs - heirs of God and coheirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory. (Romans 8:12-18)

Nature is violent. Life and death are the law of field, stream, and jungle. A lion stalks a gazelle. A heron stands motionless at the edge of a pond, its sharp beak poised and ready to kill. High overhead a red-tailed hawk holds its deadly talons close to its body, watching for movement in the grass below. A leopard family exists at a zebra's expense. Each survives on another's demise. This sounds natural enough but it's more graphic than most of us care to watch. The principle that nothing lives unless something else dies extends beyond nature to our daily walk with God. Interests of the flesh must succumb to the interests of the Spirit, or else the interests of the Spirit will succumb to the interests of the flesh (Romans 8:13 - the words in bold on top). In the jungles and fields and streams of our own heart, something must always die so that something else can live.
We can't be committed to Christ and to the world at the same time. We can't be filled with His Spirit if we are protecting the life of selfish interests. That's why our Lord said so pointedly that we will need to die daily to ourselves if we are going to walk with Him (Luke9:23-24). We must continually choose what will have to die so that Christ can live freely in us - Mart De Haan

Is there any life so blessed
As one lived for Christ alone.
When the heart from self is emptied, And instead becomes His throne? - Anon

Then he said to them all: " If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me, For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it." (Luke9:23-24)

To live to Christ, we must die to self.

Extracted from Every Day with Jesus written by Selwyn Hughes.
A new look at Calvary
For reading and meditation
The Crucifixion
As they were going out, they met a man from Cyrene, named Simon, and they forced him to carry the cross. They came to a place called Golgotha (which means The Place of the Skull). There they offered Jesus wine to drink, mixed with gall; but after tasting it, he refused to drink it. When they had crucified him, they divided up his clothes by casting lots. And sitting down, they kept watch over him there. Above his head they placed the written charge against him: THIS IS JESUS, THE KING OF THE JEWS. Two robbers were crucified with him, one on his right and one on his left. Those who passed by hurled insults at him, shaking their heads and saying, "You who are going to destroy the temple and build it in three days, save yourself! Come down from the cross, if you are the Son of God!"
In the same way the chief priests, the teachers of the law and the elders mocked him. "He saved others." they said "but he can't save himself! He's the King of Israel! Let him come down now from the cross, and we will believe in him. He trusts in God. Let God rescue him now if he wants him, for he said 'I am the Son of God.' " In the same way the robbers who were crucified with him also heaped insults on him. (Matthew 27:32-44)

Once again we come to the season of the year when we focus in particular and special way on the fact of our Lord's death and resurrection. This year our theme is The Cries from the Cross - the seven separate utterances which fell from the lips of Christ during His grim six-hour ordeal on Calvary.
Although you may have meditated upon the cross many times since you became a Christian, you will approach Christ's crucifixion differently this year from any other year of your life. This is because , although the power and the meaning of the cross never change, we do. One of the great questions of history is this : How can we know anything with certainty when everything changing? A famous philosopher expressed the matter in this way: 'If you were to step into a river, step our, and then step back in again, it would not be the same river, for the river into which you stepped, even moments before, has flowed on. Nothing is the same - everything changes.'
In relation to the earthly realm, that philosopher has a point. You and I, because of the changes that have taken place in us over the past days, weeks and months, cannot come to the cross in exactly the same manner as we did before. Life has opened us up to new things and affected us in many different ways, and because of this our spiritual apprehension is perhaps more heightened and more sensitive. Maybe our defences have come down and we are less self-reliant and self-centred. The cross and the power that flows from it have not changed, but we have changed. The old will become new - not in the sense of being a new revelation, but we will discover a new application.

O Father, over these next few weeks, as I sit in quiet contemplation before the cross, grant that the changes that have taken place in me will make me more open to seeing the changeless love that flows from Calvary. In Jesus' name I pray. Amen.

2010-03-04T01:26:00.002+08:00

going interview after interview.
wonder which job should I choose.
what is really best for me?
which is the path that I should go?

signing off
baby\ting
o4 March 2o1o - o126am

2010-02-12T23:55:00.000+08:00

We can't always want thing our way.
No matter how hard we tried, there will never be a happy ending.
God has set the path for us,
but why are we so stubborn and not follow?

signing off
baby\ting
12 February 2o1o - 1155pm

2010-02-03T21:03:00.000+08:00

I'm afraid you might leave me.
I'm afraid you might doubt my love for you.
I'm afraid you might not know how much you mean to me.

signing off
baby\ting
o3 February 2o1o - o9o3pm

2010-01-27T09:15:00.000+08:00

some people are just so irritating.
at one side saying stuff like you'll have bad karma/retribution for saying stuff about others.
on the other side, she's saying stuff about others.
I won't like to say, my life has nothing to do with you.
even if I do go home or I do not,
it's really ain't your problem.
I do not have any problem with my bf,
so you do not have to care so much.
If you do have time to be saying stuff about others,
you should have do something about your own life.

signing off
baby\ting
27 January 2o1o - o915am

2010-01-17T01:27:00.000+08:00

I must confess that my imagination refuses to see any sort of submarine doing anything but suffocating its crew and floundering at sea.

signing off
baby\ting
17 January 2o1o - o127am

2010-01-10T21:00:00.002+08:00

what do you love about me?
my love is for you :)

signing off
baby\ting
10 January 2o1o - o9oopm

2010-01-10T19:06:00.001+08:00

忘记我还是忘记他

signing off
baby\ting
1o January 2o1o - o7o6pm

2010-01-08T01:08:00.000+08:00

It's amazing how you can speak right to my heart
Without saying a word you can light up the dark
Try as I may I could never explain
What I hear when you don't say a thing

The smile on your face lets me know that you need me
There's a truth in your eyes saying you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall
You say it best when you say nothing at all

All day long I can hear people talking out loud
But when you hold me near you drown out the crowd
Old Mr. Webster could never define
What's being said between your heart and mine

The smile on your face lets me know that you need me
There's a truth in your eyes saying you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall
You say it best when you say nothing at all

The smile on your face lets me know that you need me
There's a truth in your eyes saying you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall
You say it best when you say nothing at all

PS: Was the smile on your face mend for me? Was it brighter than before? Will you ever leave me in fear or pain? Will you catch me if I fall?

signing off
baby\ting
o8 January 2o1o - o1o8am

2009-11-10T14:31:00.000+08:00

I had a dream last night, a dream which I do not know whether it's a nightmare or not. I've never woke up in the middle of night, feeling this much fear and heartache. My heart just felt as if it break into thousand of pieces and I felt breathless. I woke up looking for you but you were in the kitchen instead. You gave me a hug when you came back and I told you about my dream, you tell me everything is just a dream. Tears actually falls by itself when you hug me, everything seems so real that I just cant judge anymore. I lie back down on bed but I couldn't fall asleep. I kept thinking what was it that makes me cry, was it because I am afraid of losing you? My heartache just thinking about it. I just hope that it's really just a dream.

signing off
baby\ting
1o November 2oo9 - o231pm

2009-11-09T19:00:00.000+08:00

signing off
baby\ting
o9 November 2oo9 - o7oopm

2009-11-07T23:11:00.001+08:00

Sweetie, do you know you important you are to me? How much do you mean to me? How much I really wanted to be with you?

Whenever I log on msn when Im not with you, you were the one I search for on my list.
Whenever something embarrassing, irritating, sad, happy happens, you were the one I thought of and I'll call you immediately.
Whenever you comes to my mind, I always smile to myself and think how lucky I am to have you.
Whenever I tried to link those happy moment, you were always in the picture.

You are so special to me. Always so sweet and endearing. You make me feel like Im the happiest girl ever. Treating me like a lil princess like how daddy is treating me. Although you grumble sometime about it, but I know that you were just teasing me.

You always hold my hand tighter even if people stare at us out on the street.
You always understand me well enough to know what I need.
You always hug me and tell me how lucky you are to have me.
You would wrap your arms around me and walk through the crowd so that it wont hurt me that much if someone actually bang me hard on my arms.
You wont argue with me about the things you believe in, instead, you make me understand why do you believe in it.
You have enough faint in me and what I do.
You always know the way to support me.

You're more than a boyfriend to me. You're a lover, a soulmate, a confidant. You are someone who I call MY MAN.

No matter what will happen, Im sure that our love is strong enough to conquer it. I love you sweetie. I guess you felt the same too.

Love you, Caleb Seah ^^

signing off
baby\ting
o7 November 2oo9 - 1111pm

2009-11-02T21:26:00.000+08:00

ps : leb leb 请你相信我.爱你是真的 :)

signing off
baby\ting
o2 November 2oo9 - o926pm

2009-10-31T21:28:00.010+08:00

Hello kitty mp3
http://www.alibaba.com/product-gs/211740910/kitty_mp3_cute_mp3_cartoon_mp3.html

Hello kitty mp3 player http://www.hellokittysell.com/pd/co/hm009.html

Hello Kitty Phone Cect 318
$149.00
http://www.hellokittyphones.com/41-hello-kitty-phone-cect-318.html

Hello Kitty Casio EX-Z2 12.1 MP Limited Edition Digital Camera

Price: $499.99

http://www.dreamkitty.com/mm5/merchant.mvc?Screen=PROD&Store_Code=DK&Product_Code=K-EM542447&Category_Code=HKE

Ipod

Kitty Star (Samsung Handphone)
http://www.harrokitty.com/2009/09/samsung-e2210-s5230-star-hello-kitty-edition-handphones/

Samsung Handphone

Hello Kitty Phone 3G-168 White
$99.00
http://www.hellokittyphones.com/15-hello-kitty-phone-3g-168-white.html

A316 Hello Kitty 3G Bling-Bling mobile
S$688.00
http://www.mykittylove.com/index.php?act=viewProd&productId=2394

Hello Kitty MP3 Player 256MB + 128 SD MEMORY CARD

Price: $299.99

http://www.dreamkitty.com/mm5/merchant.mvc?Screen=PROD&Store_Code=DK&Product_Code=K-EM913472&Category_Code=HKE

Hello Kitty Digital Camera
Price: $217.59
http://www.dreamkitty.com/mm5/merchant.mvc?Screen=PROD&Store_Code=DK&Product_Code=K-EM800462&Category_Code=HKE

Anyone gonna get any of this for me for my birthday? :D

signing off
baby\ting
31 October 2oo9 - o928pm

2009-10-27T21:30:00.002+08:00

ps : 你是我的幸福吗? ;)
you have my love to depend <33

signing off
baby\ting
27 October 2oo9 - o93opm

2009-10-17T12:40:00.001+08:00

I've started work last week already. Currently working @ NUH as a Pharmacy Assist. Work there wasnt as tough as I thought it would be and it's cool to work there. People there are nice, no blame pushing, we work as a team, not one. Time passes real fast when Im @ work and I simply love it cause it means that Im able to see my sweetie as soon as I knock off :D I wanna thanks sweetie for sending me to work for the 1st day, making the 1st day of my work smooth. Even though you didnt sleep for the night and was dead tired, you still make the effort to send me to work, appreciate ^^ Thanks everyone who called and ask me how was first day of work, that was nice of you guys. Im loving the way you guys pampered me xD There will be alot of stuff for me to do for the next few weeks I guess. Gab's birthday celebration tomorrow, 21st Oct will be Eddie's birthday celebration, 7th Nov Hikai will be landing in SG, 13th Nov will be my birthday celebration. Lots and lots of party coming up and Im looking forward to all of it. Im a party person :x Anyway, sweetie was telling me about how blessed am I to have Shermaine as a friend. He was telling me that not many female will have such a steady friend, cause he was shock the other time when I was painting my room for my bro's wedding; my sweetie was helping me to paint. I got tired eventually painting for so long, and sweetie was somehow saying that I make a mess instead (as usual), so I was saying "okay I'll call Shermaine down to help me paint the room" At first he thought that I was just passing a comment, who knows I called and she agreed to come despite she got an appointment with someone after that, and it's like 11+pm when I called her. When sweetie was talking about that, it got me thinking, how many times do I really appreciate what she've done for me? Just wanna tell Shermaine (if she ever comes to my blog) you are a great friend, great sister and having you and yea JUST YOU is better than having 10 or 100 more friends. I need no more friends cause Ive got the best already ^^ If you were to ask who are the ppl that's very important to me, that would be you, caleb and dad <33

signing off
baby\ting
17 October 2oo9 - 124opm

2009-10-04T00:30:00.001+08:00

time passes so fast and now we come this far
now i want you to promise me
promise me never to mention about all the sad moment
promise me never to let me worry about you
promise me that you will be happy
promise me you will take care of yourself even if one day im not with you no more
promise me that if we ever have an arguement it will never be a long one
promise me to be honest and never lie

at this special day today
ill give you my promise to love you with all my heart
to care for you like i never care before
ill try not to tease you more :D
ill try not to demand for more stuff
and ill never let you go

i love you my silly boy <33

Happy Anniversary ^^

signing off
baby\ting
o4 October 2oo9 - 123oam

2009-09-29T05:19:00.000+08:00

i was listening to some songs and all the thought came into my mind. i realise that i can no longer stop loving you anymore. i've never know that i could change into such a better person for someone. until i met you. i found my love and i felt the love. im always smiling without me even noticing but when i do, i found that you're the reason i smile. you fill my life with sweetness and happiness which makes me wanna make this relationship work out. im serious about making this relationship work. if you were to say this is love, please allow me to say, i rely on you, i love this dependence and i can let go no more. but im afraid, afraid that what if one day you have to leave. i did think about being more independent so that even if one day you were to leave, i can still smile and move on my life, yet your love is so hard for me to let go. your love has already been part of my life. even knowing that i can never be dependent on myself anymore, will you still be able to love me the way i am. even if it means that in future, there will be more sadness moment than happy moment, will you still love me the way i am? i just wanna tell you, i dont wanna quit loving you, because i love you, because i hate to see you leave and because i cant let go anymore. do you know? can i jus be selfish this one time?

signing off
baby\ting
29 September 2oo9 - o519am

2009-09-26T07:38:00.000+08:00

everything of you, have become apart of me

signing off
baby\ting
26 September 2oo9 - o738am

2009-09-16T04:36:00.000+08:00

signing off
baby\ting
16 September 2oo9 - o436am

2009-09-11T23:01:00.001+08:00

“从前有个岛上，住着许多‘感觉’，有一天岛要沉了，大家纷纷驾船准备离去，可是‘爱’的船破个大洞，它向许多人求救。 ‘虚荣’怕泡在水里的‘爱’弄脏了它的船，‘富贵’的船上装满宝石没地方容纳爱，‘快乐’太快乐了，根本看不见‘爱’…… 正当‘爱’绝望了，一个老人伸手拉它上船，并把它放到一个小岛后，又坐上船走了。 ‘爱’一直没机会问老人的名字，不久，‘爱’遇上另一个老人‘智慧’，它告诉‘爱’，救下它的老人是‘时间’。 ‘智慧’说：时间之所以会救爱，是因为只有时间能肯定爱的存在。

ps : 你能明白吗?

signing off
baby\ting
11 September 2oo9 - 11o1pm

2009-09-04T23:24:00.001+08:00

一个人眺望碧海和蓝天
在心里面那抹灰就淡一些
海豚从眼前飞越
我看见了最阳光的笑脸
好时光都该被宝贝因为有限
我学着不去担心得太远
不计画太多反而能勇敢冒险
丰富地过每一天快乐地看每一天
第一次遇见阴天遮住你侧脸
有什么故事好想了解
我感觉我懂你的特别
你的心有一道墙但我发现一扇窗
偶尔透出一丝暖暖的微光
就算你有一道墙我的爱会攀上窗台盛放
打开窗你会看到悲伤融化
你会闻到幸福晴朗的芬芳

signing off
baby\ting
o4 September 2oo9 - 1124pm

2009-08-30T12:11:00.001+08:00

something jus snap on me.
ill hold on.
ill hold on not matter what.
this time it's true.
no matter how tough it might be.

signing off
baby\ting
3o aug 2oo9 - 1211pm

2009-08-30T07:29:00.000+08:00

不是有你在,就不会感觉寂寞.
我会努力学着不要那么依赖你.
我希望自己能够勇敢一点.
在适当的时候,我会忍住伤痛,学着放手.

signing off
baby\ting
30 aug 2oo9 - o729am

2009-08-28T07:38:00.000+08:00

alot of stuff kept running thru my mind lately and i start to question myself, how much do i weigh in your heart? how much more should i do before i can totally win your heart over? at times i felt like questioning you, but i find no courage to do so, for the fear of losing you. the kinda fear is so great that i wanted to cry out so badly, but i didnt do that, cause i dont want you to feel my sadness. i tried putting on a smile and act like nothing is wrong but it's hard for me recently. i wonder do you even know how much i cried when you are asleep? how much i hope that this insecurity feeling goes away? i trust you with all my heart to even doubt you from anything, and i mean it when i said ANYTHING, yet my senses tell me i was wrong. again i wanted to ask, yet fear to get the answer i dont wanna hear. im being naive i know. i've got no one to turn to, no one to talk to, so im coming here to let all out. i feel horrible now but i want no one to know. thinking of all this give me a massive heartache. idk what to do anymore. i gave you everything including my heart, now i cant get it back no more. im left with nothing but an empty shell of my body. i feel so cold right now, so wanna be alone now. who can understand me? who can help? i dont wanna care about what others think right now. i jus wanna be selfish, jus want you for myself. idk how much i could hold on, i jus need somewhere where i can breathe. it's so hard for me now

signing off
baby\ting
28 aug 2oo9 - o738am

2009-08-27T05:31:00.000+08:00

I wanna put a smile on your dial,
Make your day worthwhile.
Cause you mean the world to me,
And you're all I wanna be!
I wanted you to know,... Read More
Just how much I love you so.
And when you think of corny lines,
To think of this little rhyme.
I love you, you are a light,
When nothing else seems to go right.
So remember me with this rhyme,
And know I love ya all the time!

signing off
baby\ting
27 aug 2oo9 - o531am

2009-08-26T11:47:00.001+08:00

Sometimes you’re let down, sometimes you’re the one who lets someone else down. It gets hard to know who you can trust, who you can count ...on. Sometimes the tunnel has a light at the end, but usually they just look black as night.

signing off
baby\ting
26 aug 2oo9 - 1147am

2009-08-25T06:21:00.001+08:00

其实很多男孩子都不知道，
女孩子在冲他们发火后自己转过身却在不断啜泣。

实很多男孩子都不知道，
女孩子从来不会真正去生他们的气，因为她是真的喜欢他在乎他。

其实很多男孩子都不知道，
女孩子只会对自己喜欢的男生唠唠叨叨，也只会对自己喜欢的人耍性子。

你要知道，假若她不喜欢你，她根本不会来在乎你关心你，怕你做错事情。
你要知道，假若她不喜欢你，她根本不会对你发火不会冲你撒娇让你哄她，在别人面前她都是淑女。
你要知道，假若她不喜欢你，你根本就没有本事让她哭泣，让她即使生气也不会超过2天。

而这一切都只是因为她喜欢你，而这一切都因为你还不够在意她不够懂她。

于是，你们时常争吵，你认为她脾气不好，她认为你不够迁就她。
于是，你们总是冷战，你以为她不喜欢你，她以为你不在乎她。
于是，你们总是莫名其妙的彼此错过，也许擦身而过，本身就是一种悲伤着的无奈与幸福。

要知道，凄美依然是美的一种，并且美的绚丽悲凉而沧桑，那是更加的美。

因为她喜欢你，所以她偶尔冲你发火，时常对你撒娇。
因为她喜欢你，所以她才会生你的气；而又因为喜欢你，她才不会去生气很久。

你可知道，每个女孩子的心都是水晶做的，晶莹剔透，但是很容易就碰伤摔碎。
你可知道，每个女孩子都是不设防的，你那么轻易就闯进她的心，走的时候却只留下伤害。

她从来都不知道，这个世界上根本没有可以让她哭的人，因为真正值得她哭的那个根本舍不得让她哭。

她会很矜持，
她会很骄傲，
她会很冷淡，
她总是嘴里说着你走开，心里却一直叫你留下。

你了解女孩吗?

请你张开你的耳朵，
也请你打开你的心，
去听她心里真正的呼唤，
而不是她嘴里的口是心非。

她会看着你转身，然后她跟着你转身，当侧身而过的时候，
你看不见她的泪，滂沱在脸上心里。

如果你喜欢她，请你多陪她；
如果你喜欢她，请你多宠她；
如果你喜欢她，请你多让她。
如果你喜欢她，请你去听听她内心的声音，那是呐喊——请拥抱她。

在爱情里，总是彼此伤害，彷佛这样才能证明自己爱得激烈爱到轰轰烈烈。

可是，爱情里没有孰对孰错；
爱情里更加没有你比我多我比你少。
你爱她，她爱你，如此就已经足够。

不要试图让彼此的伤害，让彼此更加脆弱悲伤。
你们彼此相爱，你们需要的是温暖是幸福是甜蜜是快乐，不是伤害。

不要用沉默宣战，不要互不相让，更不要什么话都不讲就冷漠离去。
要知道，你离去的时候，你的眼睛起了雾，她的眼角泛着泪光。

越是安静战火就越深，这是冷战也是彼此的伤害——

无论是怎么的复合，那些伤口曾经存在，抹不去。

请跟她一个拥抱，用你的拥抱去化解她心里的悲伤与眼角的泪水。
她喜欢你，她绝对不会拒绝你的拥抱，她只会害怕你的冷漠转身无声安静。

请记住，相爱的人不要轻易宣战，因为冷战带来的伤害，超出你的预计。
也请记住，只要你喜欢她，没有什么是你接受不了的，

只要你喜欢她，就喜欢她的一切一切。

那么她所有的小性子所有的坏脾气所有的臭毛病，在你眼里都是撒娇。
也请记住，她喜欢你，她需要的不是你真的转身，她嘴里说着的也不是她的真心话。

她只是想你宠她，想你抱她，哪怕，没有道谦。

PS: 你能否听到我心中的那呐喊吗?

signing off
baby\ting
25 aug 2oo9 - o621am

2009-08-25T05:35:00.001+08:00

nica nica jia you and be strong.. you can hang on..

signing off
baby\ting
25 aug 2oo9 - o535am

2009-08-04T19:34:00.000+08:00

Brother's wedding finally ended yesterday.... Above are pictures taken at the wedding dinner :D Photo of the jing cha and stuff will be uploaded SOON!!!! i hope :D

signing off
baby\ting
o4 aug 2oo9 - o734pm

2009-07-25T03:12:00.000+08:00

心情突然好沉重.
我需要勇气.
我需要鼓励.
有谁能给我?
我不想变成别人的负担.
我不想爱我的人为我感心痛不安.
表面上坚强的我,真的有这么坚强吗?
面带笑容的我,真的是快乐的吗?
我还能坚强多久?
我也不知道.
我觉得我快崩溃了.
眼泪还很坚强的不流下.
可能是不想让别人看见自己的脆弱,
所以才笑着,当什么事也没发生过.
谁知道我要的是什么?
我也想这事情没发生过.
我也想自己是健康的.
我不想成为别人的负担.
也不要爱我的人担心我.
谁能教教我该这么办?
我好想自己躲在一个角落哭泣.
让固执的眼泪流下陪我度过这日子.

signing off
baby\ting
25 July 2oo9 - o312am

2009-07-22T03:20:00.000+08:00

medical report was out again. doc suggest I go for a scope. I'm scare but I guess no one knows.

anyway, HAPPY 19th BIRTHDAY to basti ;)

song for my sweetie

signing off
baby\ting
22 July 2oo9 - o3.20am

2009-06-29T22:52:00.000+08:00

Went for medical check up on 19th June. Medical report came out and I actually have anemia -.- Due to this, I cant start my work yet. They need to further investigate on my case -.- Went to doctor today, he said I'm fit to work. Finally my heart is being put to ease. I would like to thanks those people who send me well wishes especially my sweetie, sweetie's dad, mom, dad, chinny nanny, shermaine darling, daddy cool, basti and many many more. I love you guys many many <33 but people, dont talk to me as if I'm gonna die the next day. I'll be fine, it's nothing serious, trust me ;)

Angela darling's birthday is around the corner. Hope to meet her up soon. It's been like almost 1 year since I last seen her I guess. It's all because of her. Hey darling!!!! How many times are you gonna ps me and maine maine to pei bf? We miss you like hell!!! You better meet us up soon. RAWR!!!!! Shermaine darling's birthday is coming soon too. OMG!!!! I feel so broke now. I've got no idea what to get for them ~.~

Anyway, I'm dead tired today. Guess I'll go off to sleep now. Will blog again when I'm in the mood to :D

ps: Cherish what you have, you do not know what will happen tomorrow ;)

signing off
baby\ting
29 June 2oo9 - 1o52pm

2009-06-23T05:50:00.002+08:00

It's been long since I last heard from you.
When was the last text message you sent me?
I missed our appointment again.
Sorry, it was truly unintentional.

Sometimes, I wasnt able to keep you company.
You would always say "It's alright"
I couldnt let go of my capriciousness,
Sorry, I shouldnt have upset you.

Sometimes, you would give in to me,
although my male chauvinist manifests suddenly.
Sometimes, you would act like you didnt know,
silently, giving me some space,
all these thing, actually I've always put it in heart silently.

Please forgive me, for not knowing how to make you happy.
Please forgive me, for not knowing how your heart feels.
Thinking about the past, I've learnt how to make you feel more ease,
dont be spiteful, dont be wilful, and dont give up.
I'm saying "Sorry"

Sometimes, you would give in to me,
although my male chaunvinist manifests suddenly.
Sometimes, you would act like you didnt know,
silently, giving me some space,
all these thing, actually I've always put it in heart silently.

Please forgive me, for not knowing how to make you happy.
Please forgive me, for not knowing how your heart feels.
Thinking about the past, I've learnt how to make you feel more ease,
dont be spiteful, dont be wilful, and dont give up.

Please believe me that I will cherish you more.
Please believe me that I will protect you.
Our little love, it's my greatest luck.
My beloved, you're all that I think of.
Please believe, this is who I am.

Please forgive me,
Sorry, sorry

signing off
baby\ting
23 June 2oo9 - o550am

2009-06-16T03:25:00.000+08:00

I love you sweetie :D

signing off

baby\ting

16 June 2oo9 - o325am

2009-06-09T18:38:00.001+08:00

what if I turn to memories?

signing off
baby\ting
o9 June 2oo9 - o638pm

2009-06-05T11:00:00.000+08:00

dang!!! work is boring as usual. I've been entering an entry for 2 days and it's not done yet :s Today is the 3rd day liao, hope I can be able to finish entering the 1 mail -.- Job agency call me up yesterday when I'm at work. It's for the company RMA. It a lab analysis job. I was hoping they will call me up for a interview soon. Kinda sick of the job I'm working. Lady boss is kinda not very good. What's leave for when the lady boss wont approve your leave? What's MC for when lady boss say "you can go see a doc then come back to work?" Hate the politic in here also. Everyone love gossipping (esp the sales ladies) I've sick of hearing them gossip and when I've got something that need them to do, they will go "I'm not free now" Oh well, I'll need to attend someone's wedding tomorrow. I've got no idea what to wear :s Gonna go buy ah huat's present and cut hair on sunday with my sweetie. Hope I wont have a bad haircut :p Anyway it's almost time for the Firedrill exercise -.- I'll need to stop here already before the fire bell goes ringing and I've retype all this again. I'll update again when I'm in the mood :p

signing off
baby\ting
o5 June 2oo9 - 11ooam

2009-06-01T21:54:00.001+08:00

She make you languish.
She got you to be at a loss.
Her every move tell me that.
I smile and listen to you.
The more I hear, it hurts me more.
I wonder why aint you referring to me
What is that she have that I dont?
What makes you so devoted to her?
What makes you crazy over her?
I know that what I've done is no different from her
but there's no place in your heart for me

I would like to know how is she better than me?
What's the different me and her in your heart?
I know I've give you more than what she does,
but it seems that I couldnt touch your heart

You make me languish
You make me at a loss
Your every move makes my love move towards you
When she walk pass unintentionally
You'll always give me cold shoulder.
Jealousy got me swallow up
What did she have that I dont,
that makes you willing to wait patiently

I know how is she better than me
I'll never be able to touch your heart
I know that I give you more than what she does
but your heart still love her more than I do

signing off
baby\ting
o1 June 2oo9 - o954pm

2009-05-31T18:33:00.000+08:00

I read this somewhere and thought I would share with you guys

I have a boyfriend who grew up with me. His name is Jin. I always thought of him as a friend until last year, when we went to a trip from a club. I found that I fell in love with him. Before that trip was over, I took a step and confessed my love for him. And soon, we became a pair of lovers, but we loved each other in different ways. I always concentrated on him only, but by his side, there were so many other girls. To me, he was the only one, but to him, maybe I was just another girl…

“Jin, do you want to go watch a movie?” I asked.
“I can’t”
“Why? You need to study at home?” I felt disappointment grabbing me.
“No… I am going to meet a friend…”

He was always like that. He met girls in front of me, like it was nothing. To him, I was just a girlfriend. The word ‘love’ only came out from my mouth. Since I knew him, I had never heard him say ‘I love you’ before. To us, there weren’t any anniversaries at all. He didn’t say anything from the first day and it continued till 100 days…200days… Everyday, before we say goodbye, he would just hand me a doll, everyday, without fail. I don’t know why…

Then one day…

Me: Um, Jin, I …
Jin: What…don’t drag, just say..
Me: I love you.
Jin: ……you….um, just take this doll and go home.
That was how he ignored my ‘three words’ and handed me the doll. Then he disappeared, like he was running away. The dolls I received from him everyday, filled my room, one by one. There were many…
Then one day came, my 15th year old birthday. When I got up in the morning, I pictured a party with him, and stranded myself in my room, waiting for his call. But… lunch passed, dinner passed… and soon the sky was dark… he still didn’t call. It was already tiring to look at the phone anymore. Then around 2am in the morning, he suddenly called me and woke me from my sleep. He told me to come out of the house. Still, I felt joy and I ran out happily.

Me: Jin…
Jin: Here…take this…
Again, he handed me a little doll.
Me: What’s this?
Jin: I didn’t give it to you yesterday, so I am giving it to you now. I’m going home now, bye.
Me: Wait, wait! Do you know what today is?
Jin: Today? Huh?
I felt so sad, I thought he would remember my birthday. He turned around and walked away like nothing had happen.Then I shouted… “Wait…”
Jin: You have something to say?
Me: Tell me, tell me you love me…
Jin: What?!
Me: Tell me

I put my pathetic self behind and clung on to him. But he just said simple cold words and left.
“I don’t want to say…that I love someone so easily, if you are desperate to hear it, then find someone else.”
That was what he said. Then he ran off. My legs felt numb… and I collapsed to the ground. He didn’t want to say it easily… How could he…. I felt that… Maybe he is not the right guy for me…
After that day, I stranded myself at home crying, just crying. He didn’t call me, although I was waiting. He just continued handing me a little doll every morning outside my house. That’s how those dolls piled up in my room… everyday

After a month, I got myself together and went to school. But what made the pain resurface was that… I saw him on a street… with another girl… He had a smile on his face, one that he never showed me…as he touched the doll… I ran straight back home and looked at the dolls in my room, and tears fell… Why did he gave these to me… Those dolls are probably picked out by some other girls…In a fit of anger, I threw the dolls around. Then suddenly, the phone rang. It was him. He told me to come out to the bus stop outside my house. I tried to calm myself down and walked to the bus stop. I kept reminding myself that I am going to forget him, that… it’s going to end. Then he came into my sight, holding a big doll.

Jin: Jo, I thought you were pissed, you really came?
I couldn’t help hating him, acting like nothing had happen and joking around. Soon, he held out the doll as usual…
Me: I don’t need it. Jin: What….why…
I grabbed the doll from his hands and threw it on the road.
Me: I don’t need this doll, I don’t need it anymore!! I don’t want to see a person like you again!
I spitted out all the words that were inside me. But unlike other days, his eyes very shaking.
“I’m sorry” He apologized in a tiny voice. He then walked over to the road to pick up the doll…
Me: You stupid! Why are you picking up the doll?! Just throw it away!!!

But he ignored me and just went to pick the doll. Then…

Honk~ Honk~
With a loud honk, a big truck was heading towards him.
“Jin! Move! Move away!” I shouted… But he didn’t hear me, he squatted down and picked up the doll.
“Jin, move!” HONK~!! “Boom!” That sound, so terrifying.
That’s how he went away from me. That’s how he went away without even opening his eyes to say one word to me.
After that day, I had to go through everyday with guiltiness and the sadness of losing him… And after spending two months like a crazy person… I took out the dolls.

Those were the only gifts he left me since the day we started going out. I remembered the days I spent with him and started to count the days… when we were in love…

“One…two… three…” That was how… I started to count the dolls…
“Four hundred and eighty four… four hundred and eighty five…” It all ended with 485 dolls.
I then started to cry again, with a doll in my arms. I hugged it tightly, then suddenly…

“I love you~, I love you~” I dropped the dolls,shocked.

“I….lo..ve…you??” I picked up the dolls and pressed its stomach.

“I love you~ I love you~” It can’t be! I pressed all the dolls’ stomach as it piled on the side.
“I love you~”
“I love you~”
“I love you~”
Those words came out non-stop. I…love you… Why didn’t I realize that….That his heart was always by my side, protecting me. Why didn’t I realize that he love me this much… I took out the doll under the bed and pressed it’s stomach, that was the last doll, the one that fell on the road. It had his blood stain on it. The voice came out, the on that I was missing so much…

“Jo…Do you know what today is? We’ve been loving each other for 486 days. Do you know what 486 is? I couldn’t say I love you…. Um… since I was too shy… If you forgive me and take this doll, I will say that I love you… everyday… till I die… Jo… I love you…”

The tears came flowing out of me. Why? Why? I asked god, why do I only know about all this now? He can’t be by my side, but he loved me until his last minute…

For that… and for that reason… to me… it became courage… to live a beautiful life.

ps : You said I'm understanding. Do you know I'm understanding cause I love you? <33

signing off
baby\ting
31 May 2oo9 - o633pm

2009-05-29T00:28:00.002+08:00

I read this somewhere and decided to post it here :)

A guy and a lady..

*When I got home that night as my girl served dinner to me. I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know. What I was thinking, I want a break-up. I raised the topic calmly.

She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words. Instead, she asked my softly, "Why?"

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you're not a man! That night we didn't talk to each other, she was sad and weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what happened to our relationship. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she lost my heart. Maybe to someone else. I didn't love her anymore, I pitied her.

With a deep sense of guilt. I took out from my cupboard, things that she liked and desired so much and presented it to her.

She glanced at it and threw it one side. The woman who had spent a portion of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for wasting her time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I've said, telling her she have lost my heart. And even maybe to someone else. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me, her cry was actually a release. The idea of a break-up, which had obsessed me for some time seemed firm and clearer now.

The next day, I came home and saw her writing something at the table. I didn't have dinner and I went straight to sleep after a shower and fell asleep very fast for I was dead bushed. When I woke up, she was still there at the table, writing. I just didn't care and so I just turned over and fell asleep again.

In the morning, she presented me a document with some conditions. She didn't want anything from me, but wanted a months' notice before separating.

She requested that in that one month, we would both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple, she needed time to put down everything and let it go. I knew it was hard for her. So I accepted the condition. But she had something more. She asked me to recall how I carried her in and out of my room every single time we were together, having fun, poking fun at each other and stuff.

She requested that everyday for the months' duration that I would do the same; carrying her in and out of the room.. But it was different she just wanted me to carry her to the front door. I thought she was crazy. To make our last days together bearable, I accepted her odd request.

I told the things she said to my friends and they both laughed out loudly, saying she's absurd and totally insane. No matter what she has to face it they said.

So when I carried her out on the first day, we were both very clumsy. Then my mother said, "Wow, carrying her in your arms again finally!" and applauded. Those words gave me a sense of pain. She closed her eyes and said softly as I carried her in my arms, "Don't tell mum that we broke up." And I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door and off she went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to work.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest, I could smell the fragrance on her blouse. I realised I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for such a long time. I realised she was not young anymore. Our relationship has taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered, what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, I lifted her up. I could feel a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given her very precious portion of her life and time to me.'

On the fifth and sixth day, I could feel the sense of intimacy growing. It became easier to carry her as the month started to slip by day by day. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but couldn't find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I realised she was becoming more and more thin, that was why I could carry her so easily.

Then it hit me, she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

My mum came in one day, and said "It's time to carry her out again isn't it?" and smiled. I then held her in my arms. Walking from the bedroom, to the living room then to the front door. Her hand surrounded my neck gently and softly. I held her body tightly; it was just like the first time I carried her.

I drove to office. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind. I ran upstairs and told everyone that were close to me and told them I didn't want the break-up anymore; I won't. My relationship was boring and suffering probably because she and I didn't value the details in our relationship and our lives, not because we didn't love each other or had no more feelings for each other anymore.

Now I realize, that since the day that I first carried her around my house and promised her that I would be with her always, that I am supposed to hold her till death do us part.

At the floral shop, I bought a bouquet of flowers and then wrote on the card, I'll carry you out every morning till death do us part.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face. I ran around looking for my one and only girl that I loved so much. And only to see her lying on the bed motionless. Dead.

The small details of our lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the materials; the property, the car, the money in the bank. These created an environment conducive for happiness but could not give happiness themselves.

So find time and do those little things for each other that would buildup more feelings, more love, more value for the relationship and each other. Everyone, have a happy relationship :)

ps: will you still love me this way in 10 years time?

signing off
baby\ting
29 May 2oo9 - 1228am

2009-05-28T13:28:00.000+08:00

okay. Time to update. :)

26 May
Woke up in the morning, neck was aching but still drag myself to work. Was a sleepy day, cause I slept late the previous night and woke up @ 7am in the morning. Was almost dozing off @ work but I force my eyes open. Got home get sweetie to massage for me :x

27 May
Woke up, neck still pain. Somehow it got worse. I reach office and realise that my neck was actually swollen. Robin came to meet me for lunch, bought me some stuff to paste on my neck and ricola. Got home and dad ask what happen to my neck then mom went to rub it. I almost cry out when she rub it, then she say "yao tong cai hui hao" -.- I wonder if she's seeking for revenge LOL. She make me laugh by saying "i think you sit bike and zek tio" LOL It's not that way.

28 May
Didnt went to work today cause neck still hurts. I think it got worse anyway. It hurts jus by a slight movement T.T I'm gonna see a doc now and see what he say.

signing off
baby\ting
28 May 2oo9 - o128pm

2009-05-22T03:06:00.000+08:00

Why everytime when I need some encouragement, you just simply shoo me off and make me think that my afford is up to a waste? Why everytime I tried to talk to you, you simply seem so uninterested? Cant you just encourage me a little? Cant you jus show that at least you still care for me a little? I feel so down and I wanna cry so badly. I tried so hard to hold back my tears, but somehow I failed. Am I really that bad that you wont even think I could make it? I may look strong on the outside, but I'm not. I need your love, your care and your encouragement. Afterall I'm not that strong. Hearing all the response you gave me make me totally disappointed. I dont know anymore. You make me doubt myself once again. How I wish that you wont shoo me off like this. I was wrong to even expecting a praising or a caring reply from you. I tried my best to be your good girl, tried not to disappoint you but I guess what I do is jus not enough. Sometimes I wonder do you even know what I want? Do you even know how bad I feel when you say those words to me? I'm hurt, very badly I can say. I dont know if I'm angry or upset anymore, I jus feel like crying out but I dont wanna let my pride down. I jus feel like hiding in a corner all by myself right now, to think what have I done wrong that you wouldnt even wanna encourage me. I know I'm a bad girl afterall, I'm never gonna reach your expectation of a good girl. I'm sorry.

signing off
baby\ting
22 April 2oo9 - o3o6am

2009-05-11T00:56:00.000+08:00

okok. I was being asked by Mr Wang Zhili to update my blog, so I guess I shall do some updating to let you guys know what I'm doing.

For a start, I'll like to wish all mother a HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY :)

I started work like 3 days ago. It's supposingly to be data entry, but I dont know why I've been doing Customer Service and some packing stuff. Work there is a piece of shyt. Everyone there seems to be very free but me. -.- I've only work for 2 days and for the 2 days, I've been going home late. I was suppose to knock off @ 6pm, instead of going off @ 6, I go off @ 6.30, 6.45. Lady boss always give me last min stuff and it's a piece of shyt really. -.- okok I'll stop talking about my work.

As for today, it's Mother's Day. I went dinner with my dad, mom, bro, bro's gf and my sweetie. Sweetie was being force to eat dinner with my mom LOL. (poor sweetie) I call my mom when I woke up asking her if she wanna have a dinner with us and she said ok, the next sentence she said is "ask Wenjie come along". I told her that he will be going over to his mom's place to eat with his mom and she still ask me to get him to go eat with her. *sorry sweetie wasnt my fault. LOL* It all ended up that he have to eat with my mom, his mom and get back home to eat the food that his dad cook, that's like 3 dinner. LOL After eating with my family, sweetie went to find his mom and I went back home. Dad won 4D, my number came out as 2nd prize so he got a laptop for me straight. Finally got myself a PINK lappy LOL. When I said it's PINK, it reminds me of my sweetie. LOL I remember asking him to get a pink lappy, but he was lucky cause there isn't any pink tablet. LOL Anyway I know he wouldnt get it even I told him to get a pink one. He would have just say "I wouldnt get a pink one even if you like it, cause that way I'll become you and not myself anymore" LOL Ok he win, he got a point. LOL

Oh well, I suggested to sweetie that for Father's Day, get his dad to ride down to CCK and we will eat together with both father so he dont have to eat 2 meals. LOL I told him it will end up both father arguing to pay off the bill and I'll go "sweetie, go pay the bill." LOL He said no, I'm suppose to be the one paying. LOL. Oh well, we'll see how it goes by then.

Anyway, I'm off to watch my show. Shall blog again if I'm not lazy :p

To Wang Zhili,
There you go, I update liao hor, dont say dont have LOL

signing off
baby\ting
11 May 2oo9 - 1256am

2009-04-22T04:04:00.000+08:00

no matter what happen 最爱还是你 :)

signing off
baby\ting
22 April 2oo9 - o4o4am

2009-04-19T18:28:00.000+08:00

my friend ask me to go overseas to study. to go or not to go, i dont know anymore >.>

signing off
baby\ting
19 April 2oo9 - o628pm

2009-04-18T16:14:00.001+08:00

爱我的话给我回答
我的爱丫爱丫没时差
等待是我为你付出的代价
爱我的话要回答
我只等你等你一句话
走太远你走太远你的回答听不见
等待是我为你付出的代价 ;)

signing off
18 April 2oo9 - o416pm

2009-04-18T05:51:00.001+08:00

2009-04-16T04:42:00.001+08:00

oh well, I am finally home after around 2 weeks sticking around my sweetie. haha later on in the afternoon my sweetie is going for his convocation. ahahah I went down to serangoon broadway to collect the gown with my sweetie 3 days back, (I think) was funny. The lady was trying to talk to sweetie and me about signing something so he'll get some discount if ever he wanna take a picture (alone, family or wedding). The lady tried to talk to me but well sweetie was like, I wasnt much interested, as she was talking to me, I was really think 'why are you telling me all this, I am really not pretty much interested' but I cant do that. LOL as usual I jus smile. :D anyway hope later when sweetie go to his convocation, he take more photo for me.

Just 2 days back, maine maine broke up with robin le. She sms me early in the morning when I was still in my dreamland saying "I got no feeling for him le. what should I do?" I didnt have much reaction as I was not even awake. (was thinking if it's a dream. lol) It took me a while to reply her msg (it's 8+am when she sms me; ppl who know me will know i'll be stil sleeping at that hour :x) but well I still did wake up and reply her. As soon as after I reply her, I've expected that robin will call, and yes he did. He was crying over the phone ><>

I watch a advertisement on tv earlier on, got a little touched. The advertisement somehow got me thinking, and my sweetie is actually the 1st person that came to my mind when I see that advertisement. I guess if one day if he's gone, it's really gonna be the smallest imperfection that I'm gonna miss, (eg. snoring :x) so after that I told him "ty for loving me sweetie, thought I'm always sa jiao-ing". He asked me why so sudden, I just told him I was being random lol and he said that it spoil what I was trying to say before. LOL I'm sorry sweetie to spoil the romantic and sweet sentence with the 'I was jus being random' LOL but well, you make me blush asking me why so sudden. Dont bother asking me why I would blush, you know I wouldnt know lol. Sweetie do you know how great you are? and how I wanted you badly? you wouldnt know I guess :p maybe I shouldnt be so dependent on you too, cause it makes me feel weak. The feeling of missing you is bad, it makes me think weird too. >.<>

It's really 'early' now. I guess I shall stop all the talking and prrrooff off to bed. Tomorrow will be another great day, but how am I gonna have a great day without my sweetie? ><>

signing off
baby\ting
16 April 2oo9 - 0442am

2009-04-08T19:47:00.000+08:00

i'm not as strong as you think i am

signing off
baby\ting
o8 April 2oo9 - o747am

2009-04-03T10:03:00.001+08:00

am i what it describe? :D try this out http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx

it's my result :P

Your view on yourself:

You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:

You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?

Your views on education

Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:

You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

signing off
baby\ting
o3 April 1oo4am

2009-04-03T04:26:00.001+08:00

is there someone you wanted to say sorry to but dont have the courage to tell them in their face?
is there someone you have hurt so badly and never got a chance to say sorry?
if you need a place to let it out, you can visit www.sorry.sg to leave a message there ;)

ps : i miss my sweetie lots ):

signing off
baby\ting
o3 April 2oo9 - o426am

2009-04-01T19:50:00.001+08:00

For my sweetie <33
My heart problem has reached a critical stage. The doctor says "there are only two options left ICU(I see you) or U C Me

signing off
1 April 2oo9 - o750pm

2009-03-31T04:29:00.003+08:00

nica is lazy.
nica is fine.
nica will blog again someday when nica feel like :p
nica is going off to sleep now
night night ^^

signing off
31 march 2oo9 - o429am

2009-03-14T19:49:00.000+08:00

though you never say but i know you understand me :)

2009-02-18T15:55:00.002+08:00

总是忍不住寂寞掉下眼泪你才会给安慰
担心短暂的晴天随时都可能被阴狸收回
等待有机会最坏也最甜美我乐观却疲惫
因为太怕失去你所以连快乐里都装满伤悲

你不曾发觉你总是用右手牵着我
但是心却跳动在左边
你和我之间的遥远
永远隔着亲切爱少的可怜

伸出右手想陪着你向前走
感受你爱我的心跳在左边
那么深深爱你的我
想信你会了解

总在埋怨过你的冷漠之后又急着说抱歉
仿佛向疏远的你乞求一点体贴都是我不对
结果有可能最美也最可悲我做好了准备
也许太自由的你心里面那个家谁也不能回

我一直相信总有一天
你会用左手牵着我走向明天
未来很遥远却会实现
心在同一边就能够听见
你说的那句我爱你

2009-01-30T05:35:00.002+08:00

if you were given another chance.. will this still be your decision?

signing off
baby\ting
3o January 2oo9 - o537am

2009-01-29T05:15:00.002+08:00

im sorry but i really do love you..
i hate myself for being selfish somehow, but still im sorry

signing off
baby\ting
29 January 2oo9 - o524am

2009-01-13T02:44:00.002+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY FELICIA AND CRYSTAL

may you guys have the joyous year ahead and may all your wishes come true :)

Lately haven't been meeting up with sweetie. I'm kinda missing him badly already :( The week before, he went to celebrate his mom's birthday and the next day to his mom's place to stay and keep her company. How can I be so mean to steal his time to accompany his mom? And last week, I went to bai my ah ma with my parents, was having rashes too so didn't meet him up; didn't want to pass the rash to him, it's super itchy and it hurts >.> Doesn't matter, guess it's healing soon ^^

Last night maine came back from Macau, she finish tidying her stuff and then came to my house. I miss her lots while she's away. Was suppose to keep her company, but I was being a bad friend, she waited for me to keep her company and well, she fall asleep while I am waiting for the PVP KQ and then war(in game). LOL I'm sorry darling :P She woke up like 2 hours before I did, she's watching some Taiwanese drama show, got so addicted to that show till she's almost late for work. LOL I have to tell her "Girl, you're gonna be late for work already" before she get her ass off the computer to change and off to work :P

I slept at around 10pm last night, but well, I woke up at this hour today ==" Had a somehow nightmare yet it's a sweet dream LOL I didn't wake up feeling scare but I woke up smiling LOL The scene in my dream was suppose to be scary I thought and then I realise I was smiling cause I dreamt of my sweetie :P Didn't manage to get back to sleep now, so came on to blog since I thought I do have to update my friends with what I'm doing lately, so they can be up-to-date what happen to me. ^^ Oh well, guess I'll log on to Fiesta and see what I can do inside and who I can tease around with. xD I'll blog again soon, I hope :x

ps: I miss you lots sweetie. meet up soon *kiss*

signing off
baby\ting
13 January 2oo9 - o244am

2009-01-07T01:24:00.001+08:00

是在什么时候,我的生活已经不能没有你?
是在什么时候,你已经成为我生命里的一个小插曲?
是在什么时候,我已经不能在说我不在乎你?
是在什么时候,你的快乐比我自己还重要?
是在什么时候,我的世界只看的见你的存在?
为什么在我的世界反复你是这么的近,又那么的遥远?
你能告诉我没你在的时候,我的世界会是什么样子的吗?
如果再给你一次机会,这还会是你的选择吗?
是我做的不够好,还是我的好让你觉得配不上我?

ps: when i look at you, my heart skips a beat, but later that beat could mean a lifetime of tears wasted on something i knew i could never have

signing off
baby\ting
o7 January 2oo9 - o124am

2009-01-03T08:09:00.001+08:00

苦茶

微微笑的看你
越是认真就越让人心疼
街头那盏路灯仿佛在笑我愚笨
没什么能做但我比谁都真城
泡一杯苦茶陪伴你到夜深

你知不知道你总有一种能可爱的独特
让我充满勇气抵抗冬天的寒冷
怎样做才会完美像个男人
喝一杯苦茶温暖你的体温

不用等你开口先说我爱你(我爱你)
在那之前想对你说我愿意(我愿意)
你不必问你也不必等
这一刻就值得爱到永恒

我该如何让你明白我爱你(我爱你)
在那之后你点头说我愿意(我愿意)
想照顾你想守护着你
这一刻只想把你抱紧

你知不知道我也有一种很可爱的天真
大男孩的口吻魅力加到一万分
怎样做才会完美像个男人
喝一杯苦茶温暖你的体温

不用等你开口先说我爱你(我爱你)
在那之前想对你说我愿意(我愿意)
你不必问你也不必等
这一刻就值得爱到永恒

我该如何让你明白我爱你(我爱你)
在那之后你点头说我愿意(我愿意)
想照顾你想守护着你
这一刻只想把你抱紧

虽然永远太不可能
少了你的完整
两个对的人奇迹就能发生
这一刻只想把你
抱紧

这一刻只想把你抱紧

signing off
baby\ting
o3 January 2oo9 - o8o9am

2008-12-27T12:50:00.000+08:00

我一直都在

遥望着你背影
有孤单太苍白
我多么想陪着你
走过人山人海
当天空变灰白
你的忧伤澎湃
我多么想走进你
紧锁的心海
我一直都在你身后等待
等你有一天回过头看我
我的笑送给你希望你快乐
你的难过都给我
关于你的一切我都
好好收藏着
等你有一天能感觉到我
就算我在你世界
渺小像一颗尘埃
我也会给你我所有的光和热
我鼓起勇气呐喊
你要听得见
我不许你再孤单
要你拥抱我给的温暖

signing off
baby\ting
27 December 2oo8 - 125opm

2008-12-26T16:48:00.000+08:00

期待你的爱

My Life 一直在等待

空荡的口袋

想在裡面放一份爱

Why 总是被打败

真的好无奈

其实我实实在在

不管帅不帅

想要找回来自己的节拍

所以这一次

我要勇敢大声说出来

期待期待你发现我的爱

无所不在我自然而然的关怀

妳的存在心灵感应的方向

我一眼就看出来

是因为爱

我猜你早已发现我的爱

绕几个弯越靠近越明白

不要走开

幸福的开始就是放手去爱

想要找回来自己的节拍

所以这一次

我要勇敢大声说出来

期待期待你发现我的爱

无所不在我自然而然的关怀

妳的存在心灵感应的方向

我一眼就看出来

是因为爱

我猜你早已发现我的爱

绕几个弯越靠近越明白

不要走开

幸福的开始就是放手去爱

幸福的开始就是放手去爱

signing off
baby\ting
26 December 2oo8 - o448pm

2008-12-26T02:29:00.003+08:00

不想让你知道

忽然不想让你知道
忽然不想让你知道
在我心中你多重要
既然你要自由
你就得到
让你永远都记得我好
忽然不想让你知道
你的爱我已经戒不掉
就让思念淹没
我不想逃
反正你将永远不知道
今夜星光多美好
适合用寂寞去凭吊
我们曾用爱互相依靠
付出多少不用计较
想一个人多美好
就算只剩记忆可参考
被爱放逐到天涯海角
我的思念你不用都知道
忽然不想让你知道
你的爱我已经戒不掉
就让思念淹没
我不想逃
反正你将永远不知道
今夜星光多美好
适合用寂寞去凭吊
我们曾用爱互相依靠
付出多少不用计较
想一个人多美好
就算只剩记忆可参考
被爱放逐到天涯海角
我的思念你不用都知道
直到有天你我年老
回忆随著白发风中闪耀
至少我清清楚楚知道
你若想起我会微笑
今夜星光多美好
适合用寂寞去凭吊
我们曾用爱互相依靠
付出多少不用计较
想一个人多美好
就算只剩记忆可参考
被爱放逐到天涯海角
我的思念你不用都知道

signing off
baby\ting
26 December 2oo8 - o23oam

2008-12-23T04:43:00.008+08:00

你太诚实

谁拉住我谁救救我我从高空狠狠地坠落
谁叫醒我说这是梦说你和她什么都还没有
在窒息的沉默中你握住我的手
爱怎么了我怎么了一句话都没有说
我曾经以为爱情应该诚实
但诚实却是最尖锐的刀子
坦白一切留给我决定是多么的自私
我恨你就连你的感谢都太诚实
你不懂最大的温柔是掩饰
在我转身之前你看不到我流泪的样子
你没有错我没有错像一阵风吹熄了承诺
你挣扎过你要我懂那谁来懂我心里的黑洞
我从来没有这么渴望你欺骗我
想开一切正疮百口宁愿到底怎么过
我曾经以为爱情应该诚实
但诚实却是最尖锐的刀子
你坦白一切留给我决定是多么的自私
我恨你就连你的感谢都太诚实
你不懂最大的温柔是掩饰
在我转身之前你看不到我流泪的样子
哦~~
我曾经以为爱情应该诚实 ho~
但诚实却是最尖锐的刀子
你坦白一切留给我决定是多么的自私
我恨你就连你的感谢都太诚实 ho~
你不懂最大的温柔是掩饰
在我转身之前你看不到我流泪的样子

signing off
baby\ting
23 December 2oo8 - o443am

2008-12-22T07:04:00.000+08:00

you can close your eyes to thing you dont want to see,
but you cant close your heart to things you dont want to feel
and you dont have to understand how much i love you,
cause i never understand too

signing off
baby\ting
22 December 2oo8 - o7o4am

2008-11-30T04:50:00.002+08:00

accompany maine maine to one of her friend's BBQ @ east coast park
before meeting her friend
went to popular to buy some books
you guys must be wondering i will read books?
i do okay, don't doubt me xD

was suppose to meet her friend @ bedok interchange @ 4pm
as usual, we were late
he wasn't early too so it's not our fault too =X
took bus to east coast park
reach there @ around 5pm i think
nothing was ready, so we stare @ each other and chit chatting all around
throughout the whole BBQ,
i guess i only talk to shermaine ahahaha
hardly talking to any of her friend

@ around 10pm, sweetie came to fetch me
went over to his house to eat the salad which he prepared for me xD
took him almost 3 hours to make that salad ahahahah
was meant to be potato salad,
but it ended up becoming salad with potato cause his dad ate 3 of the potato =p
there's chicken meat, crab stick, hotdog, cucumber, carrot, bacon bits and potato
so much of ingredient isn't it
it's sooooo DELICIOUS!!!!
i should make him cook for me more in future LOL

i'm once again off again xD
time for bed ^^
will blog again soon i hope =p

ps : sweetieeeee~~~ you still owe me my oreo cheesecakeeeee!!!! cook for meeeeeeeee ahahah

signing off
baby\ting
30 November 2oo8 - o45oam

2008-11-27T04:00:00.001+08:00

oh it's my birthday ^^

happy birthday to me
happy birthday to me
happy birthday to nica
happy birthday to me

i'm gotta a number of present
but i guess the one i really love was the card
it mean more than anything else
every word inside touches my heart
thank you sweetie <33

i tried to post the picture of my present
but it wouldn't let me =p
so i guess i'll post it some other days?

anyway i love the all the present
and i love the company of my sweetie and love ones :)

once again i'm off
will blog again another day xD

signing off
baby\ting
27 November 2oo8 - 4ooam

2008-11-24T00:29:00.000+08:00

woots.... 3 days to my birthday ^^ ahah... was out to celebrate dev and my birthday earlier on; BBQ ^^ ahahah... i woke up at 12 noon today and nua till 1 plus then wake up LOL... xD am sure a pig huh? ^^ meet gab and flame 2pm @ IMM, none of us was early as usual.. =X went to IMM giant to get all the food we need for the BBQ... took us quite some time to decide what food to buy, cause of our budget and the number of pple who's coming down.. in the end we spend about nearly 300$ on the BBQ... @_@ well doesn't matter... we reach sweetie's mom place at around 5, went up to make yaki tori... gab teach us how to wrap the yaki tori and then he went to make the yaki tori sauce.... went downstairs @ around 6+pm or 7pm.... start the first and stuff... i wasn't the one doing all the cooking... ahah.... i'm like slacking all the way... =p got a number of present.... but sweetie don't wanna give it to me today... LOL... he's trying to be secretive, so it make me curious what did he actually get for me.... well that sucks.... cause curiousity always kill the cat LOL.... anyway, i really do appreciate all the things today :)

ps : thanks to my caleb (my boy), shermaine (my darling), gabrial, edwin, luke, flame, lizzie, mach, joshua, ken, chia, tric, dev, bro and friends for coming down... you guys make my day and i love you guys ^^
to angela
don't you ps me for guys again... RAWRRRRRRRRR!!!!

signing off
baby\ting
24 November 2oo8 - 12.29pm

2008-11-17T18:54:00.001+08:00

Counting down

10 days to my birthday ^^

signing off
baby\ting
17 November 2oo8 - o6.54pm

2008-11-06T00:20:00.002+08:00

hmmm. Current mood kinda stress. Just had my final exam for my attachment yesterday, don't think that I'm doing well for it. My instructor told us if they call us later today, it means that we are not gonna be back for graduation day >.> I'll probably scold anyone who call me today. Especially if the call is from friend of mine, and I didn't bother to save their number. It's gonna scare me if I receive any unknown number call, or if it's private number. I wanted to knoe my result so bad!!! Am so don't wanna go back for that training for another 1o weeks. NEVER!!! Final paper wasn't that tough compare to the paper we sit for in mid-term, but I went blank when I sit for the paper, don't really knoe what I was thinking about too. >.> Hope everything will turn out fine ba. Anyway, 21 days to my birthday xD ahah. Am counting down already, and I'm so looking forward to celebrate my birthday with that special someone *winks* I don't want any present, only his company ^^ Was telling him 'no cake' for my birthday celebration. ^^ I don't wanna get all dirty and oily back home. I so don't like the feeling of being oily =p Oh well, that special someone is on, I'll update again ^^

signing off
baby\ting
o6 November 2oo8 - 12.2oam

2008-11-04T17:39:00.003+08:00

It's been don't know how many donkey years since I've last blogged. Was really busy; attachment, presentation, exam preparation and stuff, really got no much time left, even if I've got time, I'll be too tired or lazy to blog. xD Well, for now I think I got pretty much more free time, so I shall make an effort to update my blog everyday, as least twice every week I hope. ^^ Training at CPTC was tired, but I pretty much enjoy it there. I learn more, I'm more attentive, I even got to make new friends that I didn't meet in school. xD Anyway, I'm off to study first. Final exam is tomorrow, need to do some revising xD I don't wish to go back to CPTC for another 1o weeks anymore. I'll update more after my exam ^^

signing off
baby\ting
o4 November 2oo8 - o5.39pm

2008-07-10T22:54:00.002+08:00

it's been a long long long long time since i last update my blog, was lazy and busy.
gonna graduate in 4 months time.
got no much time to play,
i need to really strive for it.
project project and project.
*think think think*
been really busy,
know some guy from aust, pretty nice guy
he wants to bring me to disneyland. LOL
well,
so much things happen,
i'll find one day and blog it all in :)
for now off to bed. tata and night night <33

2008-03-19T13:18:00.000+08:00

well,
nothing much to say.
After so long of hard work,
it's time for a SCHOOL TERM BREAK.

my dearest birthday is around the corner,
yet i've got no idea what to get for him.
hmmmmm,
i've got less than a week to decide on what to buy.

finally my maine maine got a job.
she's working at lot one mr bean.
today is her first day of work,
hope everything goes smoothly for her :)
and may she earn more more money to spend with me =X

i'm missing my darling Angela,
it was long since i last met her.
I think the last time I meet up with her was like....
hmm....
on my birthday,
and that's really LONGGGGG agoooo :(
I'm missing her BADLY.

Angela darling meet up with me soon PLEASEEEEEEE,
i'm missing you :)
Shermaine don't tired yourself working too,
meet me up when you got off too :)
and for the 3 weeks holiday,
most probably will be fiesta fiesta and fiesta *cheer* =p

signing off
tings aka baby\ting
19 March 2oo8 - o1.18pm

2008-02-28T14:05:00.000+08:00

I don't remember when was the last time i update my blog, too long till I can't remember. haa. Just got back home from school and on my way back home, was thinking when was the last time I updated my blog and I couldn't remember. =p So first thing when I reach home, on computer, update blog. haa. Was busy gaming gaming and gaming =p Did study up ABIT. haa. yea, just a little. =x I'm going out later, the take passport size photograph for my attachment stuff. Dateline's tomorrow!! I've still yet to write my resume, haven't pay up the fees too. hmmmm, gonna do it later i guess, or maybe tomorrow =p

Well, I miss my girlfriends.
It was long seen I last meet up with them.
I'm busy with boyfriend and school and game,
don't even have much time left to sleep. haa
Should have spend a little LESSER time on GAMING,
but I can't bear to leave my game-mate. haa
I'll miss them.
I got sweetest friend, nicest friend, even the funniest friend,
no wonder I can't stop gaming. haa
Well girlfriends, meet me soon!!!!
I MISS YOU GUYS LOTS :)

gonna go gaming now.
will update soon i guess =x

signing off
tings aka baby\ting
28 February 2oo8 - o2o5pm

2008-01-28T21:15:00.000+08:00

I woke up at 7.15am today.
First thing I do when i wake up was to on my computer and go fiesta. LOL.
went in chat with CPD and friends.
went to bath at about 7.40am so was only out at 8am.
Was late for class today,
but didn't get any scolding so it's still fine.
Came home straight after lesson.
I quickly take a shower after I got home and than prrrrroooffff to fiesta AGAIN. xD
got qinqin to level 57 and than went to play my char.
thanks CPD for helping me to do the job advancement quest. LOL.
it took me 6 hours and still didn't manage to pass. WTH !!!!
I'm sure a nub xD
play fiesta the whole day and I'm tired.
going off to sleep now.
will update again REAL soon :)

ps : nothing matter as long as you are here by my side :)

signing off
tings aka baby\ting
28 January 2oo8 - o9.15pm

2008-01-02T21:52:00.000+08:00

It's only the 2nd day of 2oo8 today,
and I've got so much to say.
I'm kinda feel so emo today,
viewing my friends blog seeing that they ain't going on so well makes me feel sad.
It's jus the start come on,
people cheer up please. :)

People are asking how am I doing,
alright I'm fine, still that cheeky little ting ting.
I'm still bless with lots of LOVE and thanks to dearie for all the LOVE.
went to the driving center at ubi with dearie today,
was asking for the registration fees and everything and tomorrow we'll be there to register :)
On the way to the driving center,
got a little chat with dearie,
he's still my sweet little baby :)
He's asking me that will my daddy be surprise that we are together for so long jus like a husband and wife.
what a question right? LOL.
but still i have to say, time flies fast.
Just one moment, and it's already going 1 year.
We are still like before, so loving so sweet.
I'm proud to say that I'VE GOT DEARIE :)
he never fails to make me smile EVERY SINGLE DAY.
he never fails to make me LOVE HIM MORE EACH DAY.
he's my everyday thing for now.
I depend on him so so much.
can't have him gone for just few mins.
I follow him to where ever he go,
and he bring me to where ever I wan.
how nice of him and I'm loving it <33
no wonder till today,
I'm still loving him so so much :)
I'm thankful that he's still pamper and loving me so so much.
He never fail to give me ALL his love.
I'm greedy, I wanted ALL his love,
not a single LOVE for OTHERS :)

Baby, I'm glad that you love me.
I'm glad that you love me like all you had ever love.
I'm glad that you never leave me all by myself.
I'm glad that I didn't give up from the start.
I'm glad that you work hard for our future.
I'm glad that you're doing everything for my sake.
I'm glad that you never fail to make me smile.
I'm glad that after all this time, we're still in LOVE. <33
Maybe I'll still young to you,
but I'm glad that you protect me from all the harm jus like how my daddy did.
Thanks for everything baby, but I'm greedy.
I want more. More of your love, more of your patient, more of your tolerance, more of everything you could give.
Thanks for been here for me whenever I needed you the most.
Thanks for looking after me and pampering me when I'm sick.
Thanks for cooking meals for me when I'm hungry.
Thanks for teaching me how to love someone and care for someone.
Thanks for protecting me and not letting people bully me.
And a uber thanks for your unlimted love.
I'm bless with your love and please do love me more.
I'm enjoying the feeling and I'll learn to be a better person.
I know you dun mind what I am now, cause you love me for who I am,
but still, I'll try to change.
Change all my bad to good,
and all my good to even better just to make you LOVE ME MORE <33
Finally I know, no matter how worse situation I'm in,
I've got you to walk through with me.
THANK YOU BABY and I LOVE YOU MANY MANY <33

o8o1o7 ting ting <33 qi qi 159776858

signing off
tings aka baby\ting
o2 January 2oo8 - o9.52pm

2008-01-01T00:00:00.000+08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE ~!!!

It's 2oo8,
a brand new year and a brand new start for me.
People, forget all the bad and begin a new day from today. ^^
Make a plan for what you want,
and hope you achieve it at the end.
work hard pple and may all your wishes come true :)

signing off
tings aka baby\ting
o1 January 2oo8 - 12.ooam

2007-11-27T00:00:00.000+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME. =p

signing off
tings aka baby\ting
27 November 2oo7 - 12ooam

2007-10-30T12:59:00.000+08:00

Just came back from school not long ago.
Darling's still sleeping so soundly,
didn't wake him up cause I know he's tired.
He's sleeping later this few days,
have been busy with his GAMING ~!!

Hmmm, got a small ~~argument~~ with darling pass few days,
but it's all over.
I'm lack of sleep and all the temper just came so suddenly.
I didn't mean to vent all the anger on you,
but like what you say,
it's only a game, why am i so agitated. *wondering*
Whatever it is, it's all over.
I knew you won't blame me for it,
you'll still pamper me don't you? =)

Exams is around the corner,
yet I'm still ~~studying~~ everyday.
I really ~~care~~ for the exam,
didn't really bother too.
All I was thinking was,
HOLIDAYS is COMING. hahas =x

Now I'm miss all my girlfriends.
It was like so so long ago since I last met them.
I miss them LOADS.
I seriously need to spare out some time for my girlfriends.
Don't worry girlfriends, I will meet up with you all REAL SOON,
cause I'm miss you all BADLY. =)

Alright, now I'm going OFF again.
Will blog again REAL SOON. =)

signing off
tings aka baby\ting
3o October 2oo7 - 12.59pm

2007-10-12T17:37:00.000+08:00

hais.
I'm so ke lian for today.
dear dear say be vegetarian today. T_T
more veggie less meat. *sad*

I almost faint yesterday night,
dunno what happen too.
Lukcy dear's around,
if not i faint in toilet also no one know. T_T

Dear so bad,
I ask him if i fanit than in hospital will he come visit me?
He say won't come cause he dun like go hospital. *cry*
so bad o?
but he say he joking nia. =)

Anyway, I wan go du du le.
tired. =x
will blog again soon.
=)

I love my beloved qi qi.
Thanks for not throwing me away yesterday. <3

signing off
tings aka baby\ting
12 October 2oo7 - o5.37pm

2007-10-08T04:12:00.000+08:00

It's a special day today,
a really special day for me and my dear. =)

yeah, it's our day.
Finally we've came so far.
Though we have some argument at times,
but time have prove that our love is strong.
You always keep me company when I'm bored,
and even be there for me when I needed someone the most.

You don't care whether I'm getting fatter or not,
but you just feed me with whatever I want. =x
You don't even care how ugly am I,
yet you still think I'm the most beautiful lady.
That's why I love you so much.

I love you not because you're handsome or anything.
It's all because you gave me the secure that others can't give.
With you around,
I can go anywhere and not scared that I'll be harm,
cause whenever I go,
I know there's a YOU to protect me.
Even if I made a big mistake,
you'll still sayang me and tell me it's okay.

I'm a little playful at times,
sometimes too playful till you'll get angry too.
Your anger was never long,
cause you knew that I'll be upset.
It always ended up in you cheering me up,
and telling it's okay.
How do I bear to give up such wonderful man ??

Sometimes I'm glad.
Glad that I didn't give up.
Glad that I have you to hold on to.
Glad that there's someone to rely to when I'm down.

Thanks for everything my dear.
I do appreciate what you've done.
I'll try my very best not to bite you anymore. =x

Happy 9th Months Anniversary <3

signing off
tings aka baby\ting
o8 October 2oo7 - o4.12am

2007-10-03T00:00:00.000+08:00

alright, o1 week have past since I last blog.
Guess what's the day today ??
It's my mama birthday =)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAMA ~!!! =)

I've got so much to say to my mum,
yet I didn't know where to start,
maybe I didn't have the courage to speak up,
or I was too afraid that she don't like me.
Nevertheless, I still did sms her.
I asked dear dear to sms her too,
to wish her a happy birthday.
I wasn't the first to wish her,
I told dear to sms her first.
Sometimes I really don't know what she's think about,
maybe I didn't really try to talk to her,
maybe I think that she's too bias.
Whatever it is,
I knew she won't come in to my blog and see,
but still I love her,
cause afterall, she's my mum.
I can't hate her. =)
Hope you enjoy your day today,
may you have a good health,
and may all your wishes comes true. <3

signing off
tings aka baby\ting
o3 October 2oo7 - 12.ooam

2007-09-25T00:00:00.000+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY ~!!

yes ~!! today is daddy's birthday.
didn't get to celebrate with him.
but never mind,
I've prepare a card for him,
cause now holiday,
than I'm working so didn't celebrate with daddy. T_T
Anyway, I ask him out for dinner the day before,
but he didn't want to.
Maybe he wan me to save up the money for myself.
He's afraid that I didn't have enough money to use.
I knew it, thanks daddy,
but it's your day o.
Don't worry daddy,
I'll bring you go eat another time k?
I promise. ^^

I wish daddy got a good health and be happy always. =)

signing off
tings aka baby\ting
25 September 2oo7 - 12.ooam

2007-09-10T16:20:00.000+08:00

hais.
kinda sad today.
I fail my PIC practical test today,
it's not that I didn't do well,
but it's because my classmate didn't do well.
My teacher told me that I've got full mark for my practical,
but due to my partner,
I fail. T_T
I'm not suppose to fail de,
I know how to do,
but she don't.
Never mind,
it's all over le,
now waiting for the retest,
hope everything goes well and we'll pass this round.

After my PIC test,
went for the old man lesson.
Kinda boring.
We went in class late,
and he started all his nagging section.
Whatever it is,
I don't care too much also. LOL.

My day didn't just end here.
No break no nothing today,
yet the lesson is all one after another.
So so tired,
but it's better,
cause we can end school earlier.
I've got chemistry today,
practical test too,
think I didn't fail it.
Hope my theory pass too.

More and more test coming up,
as the holidays is coming.
There's many many test ahead.

Today 1o September 2oo7 - PIC Practical Test (Handwheel)
- Chemistry Practical Test (Distillation Column)
Tomorrow 11 September 2oo7 - PIC Theory Test (Chapt 1 - 7)
Wednesday 12 September 2oo7 - GMP Project to be hand in
Monday 17 September 2oo7 - FPS Theory Test (Chapt 1 - 7)

Hais.
So so many test o,
but never mind,
I'm counting down to my holiday too.
11 more days to holiday,
and it will be work work work and work.
Gonna go bath and study le,
no time to play now I guess.
hahas.

I'll blog again when I'm free.
Miss you and happy holiday to those having holidays. ^^

signing off
tings aka baby\ting
1o September 2oo7 - o4.2opm

2007-09-10T01:58:00.000+08:00

I just came across one of my friend's blog.
It's kinda sad to see that he's living a miserable live.
As I'm reading his post,
I felt that I'm blessed.
I'm bless with the one I love,
and I knew he's trying to give me what I want,
striving for our future,
giving me all the best thing.
Thought sometimes I'm really angry that he spend most of his time on MAPLE,
at least he still try to make me happy when I'm angry.
Whatever it is,
I think I'm bless,
and yes,
he's bless too. =P
It's getting late already,
I'm gonna bath and sleep already.
I've got school tomorrow and got test some more.
Wish me good luck and all the best. ^^
Will blog again when I'm FREE ~!!!! =x

signing off
tings aka baby\ting
o9 September 2oo7 - o1.58am

2007-09-04T19:44:00.000+08:00

Quite a long long time since I last blog-ed.
Didn't have the time for blogging,
have been working and schooling.
Freaking tired,
but I've no choice.
Shermaine darling have been sack already,
now left me and Jariis darling,
but she's gonna quit soon.
Now it all left with me,
and yea me alone.
I wonder will Angela darling be joining me??

Currently, I haven't been having a good day.
Having a very bad toothache,
and it's that kinda unbearable pain.
Sorry dear for throwing my temper sometimes.
Though I throw my temper,
you still didn't scold me,
yet you still console me.
How nice of you,
that's why I love you so so much. <3

Although this toothache is unbearable,
but I still have to endure.
I'll be going to the dental tomorrow,
dear will be accompanying me to the dental,
just endure for one more day and I think the pain will be gone in no time. ^^

signing off
tings aka baby\ting
o5 September 2oo7 - o8.oopm

2007-08-13T22:49:00.000+08:00

I was bored now,
so decided to update my blog blog. (:
Quite busy with stuff nowadays,
schooling, working, playing. lols
Don't even have enough sleep. ):

Hmmm, my work place is opening this saturday,
anyone wanna come?? lols =x
When start work le will be very very busy le,
no time for sleep,
no time for game,
no time for shopping. ):

Jariis darling told me the other day that she will be away for some time,
kinda sad to know that,
cause this mean less outing for us,
less talking,
less fun together. ):
Don't worry Jariis darling,
cause will never miss you any lesser than you do. (:
We'll wait till the time you come back and join us.
We a bond together,
don't forget, Angela darling, Shermaine darling, you and me,
we are always together,
as one,
so no matter how far you go,
how long you will be gone,
we still will wait, and we know that you will be back safe joining us,
having all the fun.

Be back fast,
and don't make us miss you too much arhs.(:
muacks

signing off
tings aka baby\ting
13 August 2oo7 - 1o.49pm

2007-07-22T16:52:00.000+08:00

hey boy ~!!
always remember this..
when i am sad , you hug me real tight
when i cry , you lend me a shoulder to lean on
when we meet , i cant get my stares off you
when i whine , you hush me
when i ignore you . i wan your attention.
^^

signing off
tings aka baby\ting
22 July 2oo7 - o4.52pm